Psalm 40:13,16,17
“Be pleased, O Lord, to save me; O Lord, come quickly to help me. But may all who seek you rejoice and be glad in you; may those who love your salvation always say, “The Lord be exalted!” Yet I am poor and needy; may the Lord think of me. You are my help and my deliverer; O my God, do not delay.”
My Father,
My daughter come. I love you -you are Mine; you are safe with me.
Okay Dad, thank-you. I have a sense Lord that I’m not supposed to do something; something I really want to do. Lord I pray you’d show me what it is that I shouldn’t do. The only thing different is in a few weeks I’ll be sharing part of my testimony on stage, and I can’t imagine I’m not supposed to do that?! However you lead Lord, because I’m ready to do it..
I know My daughter. Rest, you’re done, and all is well with you.
I’m holding onto you Lord, Jesus, resting into you. I’m imagining resting my head on your shoulders, knowing that I’m a perfect fit in your heart. And because you’ve caught me, found me, I know the missing piece in your heart has been filled. I know and feel loved deep down in my heart because I’m the only one who could fill in this empty spot. Because of this, the empty place in my own heart has been filled by the only one who could fill it. Thank-you Jesus for pursuing me so persistently. If you hadn’t done that, I think I’d still be in that cave/place-representing a heart that had been hardened because of not knowing your love. Now I know what love is because you’ve shown me in our journey together. I love you Jesus and I’m never letting go of you.
Caroline my daughter, I’m proud of you -you’ve done well and you are mine.
Reflection:
Hello everybody!! Yesterday I recorded my testimony and I was able to cut the length of it in half, yay! I was wearing my converse and orange socks:) So because I was doing that I didn’t have time to post, but I’ll share the dream I had two nights ago. But the day before that, Wednesday, I subbed for grade four in the afternoon, but in the morning as I was sitting at my desk doing my bible study I fell asleep because I was so tired; I had a quick dream where I was standing at the back of a Lego store in a mall, standing in the middle so that the front entrance was directly in front of me except at the front. In the room on the floor were several large lego piles; there was nothing else in the room except these large lego piles that needed to be put together into one section of the room. The section of the room it needed to be was right at the front but to the right side (right in the corner touching both walls) from where I was standing facing the door; so if someone would come into the room, the already snapped together lego would be to their left. I had a sense in my dream that because there was so much lego, when it would all be put together it would nearly reach the ceiling. How I imagined the lego to be put together in my dream was that it would follow both walls, looking like a wide opened V, but there were many lego pieces that were also filling this space. I don’t know what this could represent, though lego to me represents making our own things.
Two nights ago I dreamt that I was walking outside in a busy street in a city, walking along a narrow street like it was a shopping aisle. In the middle of these streets was one long row of tables with food for people to buy; not already-made food, but ingredients that are needed in order to make meals. As I was walking along the left side of the long table, looking at all the ingredients, I saw a big yellow cocoa container. All these food items were in individual opened boxes or something, and every ‘box’ contained different items; there wasn’t any item that was the same in these individual boxes, but we’d be able to find many of the same ingredients in many of the other boxes. There were many many people walking around, looking at and taking ingredients (I didn’t see people take anything and I don’t remember taking anything; this was just a sense I had in my dream.). There were several different streets like this that were connected to each other, like a street market. As I was walking, I yawned or something to get something out of my throat, and I put my hand by my mouth so whatever was in my throat would fall into my hand. When I saw what was in my hand, it looked like a thin square brown thing that reminds me of those chocolate mint individual packages, I don’t remember what they’re called. I thought to walk to the bathroom and I had two options; the one farther away was in a store and I pictured it in my mind (it looked bright inside and the floor and bathroom stalls were a light colour) or I could go somewhere closer. I didn’t actually go to the bathroom after that in my dream. I also peeled something small and hard out of my right ear; it kind of had two lumps and I broke it in half with my fingernail. Then as I was walking I was observing three men who were walking casually along, talking and laughing and enjoying each others company. I’m not sure here either what this could represent, though I’m looking at ingredients to buy. This is what I think it means: I’m looking at ingredients to buy, which represents all the things the Lord has taught me over the years of spending time with him everyday. Yesterday I needed to choose from many things the Lord has taught me; I needed to be selective because the video couldn’t be too long.
Last night I woke up around midnight and I wrote down this dream: In the not so far distance I could see two really big wolves standing in someone’s yard in the country, both facing the direction of the house. In my dream I didn’t see the house but I saw and had a sense that the area the wolves were facing was where the people were living. The wolves were focusing their eyes onto this area and were standing like they were ready and alert. They were both light in colour and I noticed they had long snouts. In another part of my dream I vaguely saw/ had a remembering that I had been attacked by wolves; I was sitting on the ground with my arms around my legs and I saw the wolves angry faces as they bared their teeth as they lunged forward and attacked. Another part in my dream I was standing in front of a bathroom stall and the girl who was in there was safe from these wolves because she was in there. I saw through the crack between the door and the wall of the bathroom stall, her brown hair and I knew she was sitting and looking down. Another part in my dream I was inside with Lucas. He was determined to go out where these wolves were, and I actually needed to forbid him from going , that’s how forceful with my words I needed to be because of how determined he was to go out there. I had my arms around him and moved him back as I spoke to him; I knew these wolves would tare him to pieces. He was so determined to go that he would hardly listen, but in the end he relented. In my dream I knew that along the path Lucas wanted to go, it looked clear and safe, but the wolves were hiding and would devour him if he went. I don’t know what this could represent. I’m thinking that in the near future, I will want to go in a direction and the Lord will tell me no, because of the danger (to what is the ‘no’ referring too?) The path will look open and safe, but if I walk in it I’ll be in danger.
On a happier note, I don’t eat candy because of the sugar, but my favourite ones are Rockets, the white vanilla ones are my favourite:) Some things that grabbed my attention over the last few days; when I subbed for grade three on Tuesday, there was a black and white timer by the door that looked identical to the one I sometimes see in other videos. Another thing that caught my eye is the clock in the other classroom, grade four that I subbed for on Wednesday. This clock reminds me of one of my dreams where I was inside a submarine deep in the water, trying to get away from an attacker who was in pursuit of us. We had gone through a wide metal opening and the sliding door was closing behind us. The way the door looked and the shape of the things around the door was the same as the clock I saw in the classroom. After the pie auction my kiddos and I sat down to eat sub sandwiches; I was so hungry that I actually ate two, 6 inch cold cut combo sandwiches. I really enjoyed helping out, though bringing the fruit platter that was top-heavy because it was in the arrangement of a bouquet was so scary! I wanted to get it over with because it was making me nervous, so I tried not moving it at all as I brought it to the other table and I was so relieved it didn’t fall! I can’t imagine ruining someone’s creation! This morning we did a whole bunch of front squats for our workout, and toes to bar, something I used to be able to do! So today I just did knee raises while hanging on the bar, but the amount I did made it a good workout. I found one photo of when I used to do crossfit, and in that photo I was doing my one rep max of back squats, which was 195lbs. My one rep max for deadlift was 215lbs, and my strict press I’ve never been able to lift a lot -55lbs. I don’t know how to make the photo smaller; it didn’t give me size options, oh well. Tonight we’ll be watching a movie though I’m not sure which one. Anyways, I’m in the middle of making cinnamon pecan buns.. I didn’t end up putting pecans in them.. Blessings...