“Again Jesus spoke to them, saying, “I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will not walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.” -John 8:12
Conversation and Reflection
1:00 Yours/something is yours or something is mine
1:07 I woke up, having the same sense that something is mine and/or that something is Yours. (I am yours and you are mine..)
4:12 “Show me, who You are and fill me, with Your love and lead me, in Your love to those around me.”
4:29 “Show me, who You are and fill me, with Your love and lead me, in Your love to those around me.” And I will build my life upon Your love, it is a sure foundation..”
5:09 “Come My darling, it’s time. You are Mine.
5:11 Papa! Help me!
5:14 My daughter, rise, (it’s yours)
5:16 Yes Papa, I’m coming.
5:24/25 Papa, show me, who You are and fill me, with your heart and lead me, in your love to those around me.
5:33 Papa, help me see. Help me see what You want me to see.
5:34 I will show you.
5:37 Show me, who You are and fill me, with Your heart and lead me, in Your love to those around me.
5:45 I had fallen asleep and woke up hearing in my heart, “Faith is having something you believe.”
5:46 Papa, I believe. Do I believe? You know my heart.
I do
6:51 I fell asleep and when I awoke I sensed the words, “Bigger chunks” (bigger steps, or I need to throw bigger chunks of faith at the boulder in front of me?)
6:55 I coughed in my sleep, waking me up but it wasn’t really a cough. I’m not sure why this happened or if it’s important.
I dreamt that there was a woman who had a son who was going to get married. I thought that maybe the man wanted to get married to her so that he would have her kids. Then I thought he wanted to marry her because the government owed her money. As the pastor was getting ready in front of a mirror in a bathroom, I walked up to him and I whispered these things in his left ear. I said something like, “talk to him about that.” Okay so I’ll talk about that, thank-you Holy Spirit! My hubby is such a Godly person. He’s shown me over and over again that God is what’s most important in his heart and in his life, and because of this, I trust him. I know no-one’s perfect, and when I see mistakes, that will be okay because my foundation is God, not him.
Then the scene changed where I was walking down the hallway towards a room (like the ones in the foyer close to the hallway by the offices, except in my dream it felt like the room was where the Theatre is), really excited because I was going to get married!! The door was open enough for me to peek into the room from in the middle of the hallway, and I saw the room was filled with people. They were sitting in rows of chairs, facing my direction (facing the door). They were all looking up towards the front, and none of them were talking with each other. As I was looking at them, really excited, they began noticing me but not in a recognizing way, and I had a thought that maybe they didn’t know who I was. Either like they really didn’t know who I was or it was the pretending to not know but they were keeping it a secret, and I had a hesitation thinking, will they keep pretending and then I’m going to fall flat on my face?
In this short dream I was painting a picture. I had painted the background and was smearing the big paintbrush into yellow paint and was painting a big yellow sun right in the middle of the painting. Then there was a bit of a wall (like I had taped cardboard onto a flat surface and had used that for my painting), and I saw that the sun (made out of yellow paper and had the yellow rays sticking out from the centre) was on the wall about halfway, so I slid the sun off the wall or further off the wall of the painting so it would be more on the flat surface. I”m not sure what the wall represents but I have a sense that it was good that I was sliding it off of it. Sun is setting?
I finished the book in time. I’m subbing this afternoon for grade 2. I washed my white housecoat and my old one. (reminds me of the lyrics, “He washed me white as snow.”)
I had dreamt the other night that I saw a back-scratcher. It was a small plastic hand on a stick that had its fingers curved in, like a hook, and I vaguely saw someone’s hand begin to it up.
In my heart I had begun to walk with fear, thinking, what else is hidden in my heart that I don’t know about? Now I’m thinking that if there’s more stuff and if there were no-one watching, I’d crave to know if there was more that’s hidden because between the Lord and myself, I want to be set free of everything that I need to be set free from. Having said that, it’s so good that other people know about this because it keeps me accountable, I’m more humbled, and I know they’re for me and not against. I was so relieved that I finally opened up in prayer at the beginning of the night! God is Good, all the time!
I’m subbing the whole day tomorrow , grade one. Today went really well; in the class I was in there was a student teacher, and the class I’ll be in tomorrow will also have a student teacher. So I won’t need to do very much, basically be her support! I forgot to write about a short dream I had last night; I was looking in my new wallet and I saw a blue five dollar bill! I’m not sure what this represents. Money represents having the power to attain goals, and light blue represents something positive. I’m hoping I will sense correctly this Sunday. I’m planning on sitting in the second from the front again and will go up for prayer, to come against inner rejection. Goodnight, many blessings…
April 12: Golf cart. I had put a thing onto it by the steering wheel to be able to look back easier (like a review mirror except it didn’t have a mirror; it looked more like a square camera. The two people who owned it (and who were sitting on it) didn’t want to use it because it would mean that if something were to happen to the golf cart, insurance wouldn’t cover it, so when I understood that, I began taking it off. The sense I have from this is that I’m not supposed to look back, back to what my life has been. Walking forward, my life will be so different than what I’ve known, and I’m embracing it and welcoming the change..
I had a yellow bag that was empty, and I was airing it out, waking it in the air. I was camping and I had my stuff in another bag. I was making sure the yellow bag was dry in the inside and I was planning to neatly fold all my clothes and put them neatly in stacks in the bag; I was going to transfer them from the other bag to the yellow bag. Yellow has been the theme the last while.. it reminds me of the conference Youth is going to tonight. Thinking to ask if I can come along. My stacked and folded clothes reminds me of the dream where I saw many folded shirts that I had messed up on my way down the stairs. Wondering if this means God is allowing me to volunteer Friday nights? I don’t want to ask again but will wait until I’m invited..
I was standing on a patio facing the house and the boards were breaking in one area. I saw underneath the patio; Bella had been playing in the dirt like a sandbox. There were two big play vehicles she was playing with that were kind of underneath the patio. But I could see them because the patio boards were breaking. Then I was filling in the two holes she had created.
5:55 I had fallen asleep downstairs and I dreamt that I was standing by a white (white because of the water splashes) soft waterfall.
6:00 I woke up and had dreamt that I was telling Lucas, “Lets get up, I need to get ready too.” That was this morning, needing to get ready for work.
6:35 I woke up again and had dreamt that I was sitting up front listening to a message. I saw the pastor (felt like pastor M) was holding a cute little baby, making the baby’s head go from side to side and then back and forward. This morning two boys in my class were reading a book about dancing, hopping from side to side, backwards and forwards. Is God leading me out of my comfort zone again? Of course!
7:40 I woke up with the words, “full time” in my heart. Someone was going to talk with me about how he was doing something full time in his church or talking about working full time in the church. We would get together and talk about it.
In this dream Someone who had parked , camped right behind us (we had been talking with him already) was asking us to park sideways, and then he would too and then we would share the middle space.
Dreamt that I was watching someone slide down an icy hill on their butt. 3,2,1 go. I saw snacks sliding down behind him and saw he slid over rough/rocky areas, thinking that would hurt. A helicopter (I sensed a helicopter , not saw) was following him and others go down. The person had gone up the very high mountain and was going down the other side when the person in the helicopter wanted to video tape it so he was hurrying up the mountain as fast as he could go because he didn’t want to miss it. I saw him get to the top and go down steeply like in the movie, Top Gun. I think he got the footage. This is my noon hour.. blessings…
April 13: I’m sensing that I resisted Jesus again yesterday, not seeing clearly. Because of my dream and the book about hopping two steps to the right and left and forward/backword, I ended up going to the hip-hop session! It was a lot of fun even though after awhile I couldn’t keep up. I recognize a few different things; I’m sliding down an icy mountain really fast, getting hurt along the way (growing in trust in my shepherd..); I wasn’t alert enough to realize that I should have gone to the leaders session. I didn’t look to see what all the sessions were -at first I didn’t know they were posted because it wasn’t on the card we were given. Then I looked on my friends phone but didn’t see them all. Then as we were walking to the stairs I saw the poster about all the sessions but we had already decided to go to the sexuality one. When we got there I remembered I had heard there was a hip-hop session and thought God wanted me to go there, so I apologized to my friend and said that I think God is leading me to go there, so I went. I had a dream where I gave someone a white mug of something hot and they accepted it; it reminds me of having a conversation at that exact spot, and in this conversation I was crushed again (my own doing) but was left with better spiritual eyesight and a heart level acceptance about Jesus’ genuine love and care for me (I was the one to receive the cup/comfort, and I accepted it and took it to heart. Thankyou Jesus, I love you…. I can see better that Jesus really does love me and that he protects me as we both are suffering because of my hearts resistance. I’m sorry for resisting again.. I think and I hope that my heart is finally ready to believe that Jesus truly loves me and that I can trust in his love for me. Blessings… Here’s my sunflower painting I did today! (with help!) ☺️
April 14, 5:43 I woke up and heard these lyrics in my heart and went downstairs to pray: “I sought the Lord, and He heard, and He answered, I sought the Lord, and He heard, and He answered. That’s why I trust Him. That’s why I trust Him.”
I dreamt that there was a blue 5L water jug sitting on the floor in front of me, and the top was completely open; the whole top (not just the spout at the top) was cut off and I saw it was filled with water. I also saw two long curved white plastic “straws” (reminds me of the water pumps, the long thing that goes into the water, except these were flexible) going into the water jug that were each coming from other jugs, pouring more water into it. I was worried that the jug would overflow with water so I took one out and saw a kid (or younger person) and asked her to put her finger on the end of it to stop the water from coming out. I knew the other one was still pouring water into the jug and I thought that okay and wouldn’t overfill it. Before all of this, I saw a plastic “straw” laying on the floor and no water was coming out of it, but I have a feeling like water would soon come out. (This morning in my prayer time I wasn’t very emotional) I vaguely saw a lady standing nearby, not sure if this is correct. I’m thinking this has to do with ministry time, being poured into.
We watched Elemental yesterday; about water and fire coming together and at the end the daughter layed down on the ground face forward. It was to show the deepest respect to her dad. And her dad accepted it by doing the same for her. Reminds me of the time where I sensed to do that in prayer for God. I do this all the time at home when I’m downstairs spending time with God. I just wanted to say that in the dream the other day about the golf cart, I saw that it was kind of cornered, like it couldn’t back up anymore because it was backed up against a wall, and I was in front of it. Blessings…