“Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.” Galatian 6:9
Conversation
Papa, I love You with all my heart, and I worship You. I love You Holy Spirit. Please revive my heart some more Holy Spirit..
I love you My darling; you are Mine. Come My daughter, rest in Me.
I’m giving myself to You Papa, Holy Spirit, to rest in You. I love You Jesus; I pray Papa that I would know deep in my heart that Jesus loves me.. I can see it written and I hear it; I pray that You would make it known deep in my heart. Fill his love in my heart so much that my heart will be saturated with it. I submit my all to You Papa.
(As I was resting, listening for the Holy Spirit’s voice, I saw a picture of butterflies flying in an open cave. I was in the cave, facing the large opening.)
Carolyn My dear one, rest in all You do for Me. I see everything. Nothing will go to waste.
(I saw a newly built bridge (a long road and bridge), and Jesus was there, comforting the people who were taking shelter there, patting them on the head.)
Thank-You Papa, Holy Spirit for Your work in my heart and in my life. I will sing of Your love forever.
Reflection
Hello and welcome to my Journal. Life in the valley can be very difficult, but we need to remember that God is always faithful. Right now I’m in a valley, being tested and pruned so that in God’s time I’ll be ready to walk out of this valley, Victorious! What I’ve been doing as I’m waiting is spending time with God and keeping on doing what He’s already asked me to do. I’m clinging onto hope because God is my firm foundation. God is faithful and I know that He will never let me down, and I’m going to stay faithful to Him. He has shown me His faithfulness all the time and I know His love through that. God gives me dreams and wakes me up at certain times. As you read my journal my hope is that even though I’m in a valley in my life, I hope you will be inspired to always keep your heart open to God no matter what’s going on in your life, because God is a God of Love and He always has a Good plan for our life. He knows how to lead us; we just need to trust Him and follow Him! Very often God draws my heart to Him through love songs! My love for God/Jesus keeps on growing as I continue to pursue Him. During the night God wakes me up at certain times with either a word from Him and/or a dream. So here’s my journal entry for today..
12:45 (I don’t remember this quick dream)
12:54 Seek (search for)
2:29 photo album
3;33 “A thousand generations, falling down in worship..
3:37 There was a smallish circle and in the circle I saw a clear picture of someone.
3:50 “Monday to Friday”
4:33 “Okay everybody” seeing a tall glass of something green like a smoothie. (I made myself a smoothie)
4:51 I saw a pile of light purple lanyards (they were bigger than lanyards but looked the same) being moved little by little.
5:04 I vaguely saw a yellow circle with black in the middle.
5:06 sensed Africa
5:12 I saw a tall light blue mug (colour of my phone), like Bella’s Stanley. I made a smoothie this morning and put it into the tall light blue starbucks smoothie cup we have.
5:17 I saw a big garbage bag open and someone touching the top of it, maybe to prepare putting something in it I’m not sure. I didn’t see a hand but it was moving like there was a hand there.
5:21 “You’re going to have an awesome time at “OZ” or something like that. Meaning: Wizard of Oz (?) film in Kansas known for tornados; Spirit 360? I (we) will be going to Spirit 360 tonight..
5:34 I saw someone reach deep down into something like the drain in the basement of a house that always has waste water; I saw someone reach deep down as far as their arm could go, and brought my phone up, seeing it in their hand.
5:40 I heard someone talk about a territory, hearing the word, territory. Yesterday I listened to Ana Werner’s 4th and last message of this Seer School, and she talks a bit about how to come against the territorial spirits, and to only do that if God has asked you to do it.
5:43 What is it going to take Papa? (feeling like I always miss something)
“Knowing that he (Jesus) loves you.”
5:44 How will my heart know that Jesus loves me?
I heard something about the song revival (Gods not dead He’s surely alive He’s living on the inside roaring like a Lion)
6:05 “same hands”
6:11 “I love spending time with you every day of the week.”
6:22 “Because my God will fight for me.” I was in our bathroom. I put a green rag in the doorway and closed the door. I left enough of the rag sticking out for me to grab ahold of. I grabbed ahold of it and pulled it through, thinking the enemy was going to grab the other side. Then I sensed the enemy, feeling overwhelmed and began saying something like, “in the name of Jesus” and heard the words above.
6:29 “Twice as intimate onto him.”
6:30 I asked Lucas if he was going to be on the phone.
6:32 I saw some cars parked on a driveway and two people sitting in the driveway by the garage. They had two pizza boxes open in front of them, and I saw one of them was holding their phone open on top of the pizza, like they were taking a photo of the inside of the box.
6:36 “..and she’s like…” I heard Bella’s voice talking about someone.
6:39 I closed my bedroom door; In my dream the door didn’t click shut.
6:43 “oh, I will” I saw a woman closeup, not her face, wearing a black and white plaid shirt. The material reminds me of Bella’s pants pj’s.
6:48 Two people eating a burger beside a restaurant.
6:55 I saw a small transparent container full of colourful sprinkles
7:00 I saw two hands making a heart
7:02 I lift my hands up lay my whole life down, my whole life down before You.”
7:06 “same to you”
7:07 “God is my fortress and He fights for men” (me).
7:13 heads up
7:14, a lady said,”I’ll take them all.”
7:27 “I am for you, not against you.”
7:29 “we thought we could pull it in but we couldn’t.” I was standing in our garage and the big garage door was closed. I saw a lady facing me and I think she said this. I’m thinking I didn’t make it.
7:33 I saw the big M for McDonald’s very clearly, also seeing the yellow very clearly.
7:40 walking on a parking lot
7:50 “and they did it again”
8:02 I was looking in the Bible and noticing the wording, how simple some words were. I also had a picture, seeing an event that took place in one of the stories in the Bible; I saw and was in the water by a biblical ship. I saw crocodiles hungrily waiting for someone to fall out of the ship, eagerly looking up and waiting. I believe I’m not going to fall out of the ship; I’m staying close to God.
8:16 “a spoon full of water.” I heard someone say this. The feeling I have is that today as I spent time with the Lord, I drank the spoon full of water.
Sometime after 6 I dreamt that I was in a camper trailer, seeing Bella lying down, trying to get comfortable on one side of the cushioned seats by the table.
Changing the subject, during the evening I recognized a few things about my dream; the gift baskets were the offering baskets; the gift card was the $15 I gave towards the offering, using my debit card; jumping with both feet happened during one of the songs where I jumped past the doorway and back in; I’m going to start reading chapter 12 of my Marriage book and listen to Ana Werners Q&A as I’m driving. Blessings and Love🫶🏼
3:50 I dreamt I was going really fast across an intersection
4:03 victory, saw a lady jump up and put her hands up in victory
4:05 I sensed prayer rooms
4:07 I saw a lady had had her head in a wooden lock and she squeezed her head out. She had long hair.
4:09 Cut it?
4:10 I saw a boy on a big tricycle that had tractor like wheels, except not as big
4:13 walking out of the elementary school
4:14 I heard someone say my name, Caroline (the song, “Sweet Caroline” came on:))
4:24 Beninging
4:29 saw a kids legs running, having fun.
4:45 I saw a red stop sign
Sept 27: 8:26 Beautiful one I love, beautiful one I adore. Beautiful one my soul does sing. (I’m not sure if this is the right time; this is what I had put)
12:51 I dreamt about a wedding, seeing a kind looking lady looking at me who was standing at the front. (I’m sensing to sit in the front on the right side.)
3:05 I don’t deserve this darling you look perfect tonight. Sensing a “nooo”
4:46 “We’ll make a palace, of this apartment the best thing of all, we’ve only just started and I know, you’re home I’m home…”
5:22 I was driving in the States
9:30 When we drove onto our street yesterday coming home from home group, I all of a sudden felt such deep love and passion in my heart, comfort from the Holy Spirit…
I’m sensing the brown wooden driveway represents the dance floor, which I danced on, yay, line dancing. Also, there was one time where the group had formed a line with their hands on the persons shoulder ahead of them; I got there right in time before they were going to close the line, so I was the last person in the line just like in my dream (the person playing the symbol was the last in line). Someone pointed out the biggest slice of pepperoni pizza so I grabbed it, then later I had another one. I had TreeTop Lemon Tea and ate the tops of the broccoli. Today was another time where I genuinely didn’t think I should sit where I was going to sit and I regret it so much. I should have just gone to sit there by myself; with someone with us it would have been a larger group. I really do know deep in my heart that Jesus loves me. Please please please don’t give up on me… I think that now when I’m certain about something that God shows me and when I think circumstances have changed, I’m going to stop and pray about it rather than just go with the flow of my thinking. Tomorrow morning I’m going to J’s house to do a painting, white flowers. I’m praying for another opportunity…I really want to do this, and I know I can with Gods help.. 🫶🏻
September 28:1:53 I vaguely dreamt of saying that I trust the person, there were two girls (one of their names I’m sensing is Natalie). I believe this shows that I trust Jesus…
1:54 I saw a big yellow thing.
4:17 “You light up our way, You light up our way”
5:53 “change”
5;56 “You keep hope alive, you keep hope alive.”
6:00 “Rose up from the grave rose up from the grave!”
6:94 I saw Jesus standing, with his hand to his lips, kind of looking down and thinking.
6:10. Saw someone do a big circle with their arm, like saying, come.
6;11 “with power to save with power to save”
6:14 I saw a black, open zip up sweater
7:06 In a dream I saw an African mom and her daughter
7:09 safe
8:18 Be still and know, that I am God. Be still and know, that I am God, be still and know that I am God. (song, sensing to rest. I heard in my heart God saying “you are Mine” and Jesus in front of me, looking steadily into my eyes to focus and of promise.)
8:29 “with God all things are possible. (While praying in the spirit)
8:33 In a dream I vaguely saw an airplane, sensing both wings gliding high in the sky.
8:38 I’m determined to come; nothing will stand in my way. Sensing to gerd, put on the Spirit of truth.
8:41 I believe Jesus that you are mine and I am yours…. 🫶🏻
This morning I painted a Lilly! I’ll finish the next time I go to her house. I’m so thankful for her guidance! I had Jasmine Tea at her house! The next time I go to McDonalds I’m going to order a burger and a strawberry shake (an upgrade from a cone) and eat outside, sensing this from one of my dreams. I’m sensing that the dream about seeing children waiting in an upper room for the wedding to take place means that I’m waiting for the Holy Spirit’s anointing..For tomorrow I’m planning on wearing my green dress and sitting at the end of the first row, unless I’ll be shown otherwise. I’m excited to try again!! We’re planning on going to the Corn Maze..I heard a special song today.. I donated for Christmas gifts for our sponsored child and for another child. I’m volunteering for the World Cafe this Sunday, and I signed up to volunteer for Collide.🫰🏼
Jesus loves every messy and beautiful part of me.. cheering me on.. and encouraging me to be myself.. thank-you..🫶🏻
September 29: 11:46 I had a quick picture while I was awake, almost asleep, of a fish that had been cleaned and laying on a wooden picnic table.
2:26 two giraffes
3:05 “Rose up from the grave rose up from the grave”
3;21 “Just another manic Monday. Wish it were a Sunday, cause that’s my fun day.”
3:45 “God be the Glory!” (I got woken up with a start, hearing these words in my heart. I went downstairs to pray.)
4:44 Holy Spirit (me pressing in)
4:45 Pentecost (I heard in my heart)
5:10 “Roses of perfection” (as I was pressing in)
I’m sensing to sit right at the right, front row because that’s the place I should have sat on the 27th. Also, I had dreamt the day before that at 6:11, “I love spending time with you every day of the week.” And then at 6:29 (6:11) “Twice as intimate onto him.” So I’m sensing I need to sit there twice; I had missed it at the wedding so I’m going to sit there today. ) Also thinking to go to Birds Hill Park after church today to go see the cafe (I saw the horses and petted them at maze), and also the beach; my dream about pressing a water bottle into the sand (beach umbrella?), which also means a long awaited vacation!!
I forgot to say that after the Newcomers Lunch, when I saw one of my pastors standing with the home group and beside him was a chair, I sensed to sit there, sensing it had Gods anointing oil on the chair like I had been shown in a dream.
6:10 I was falling asleep and I dreamt about following someone and walking through the office doorways. I was seeing the floor and the bottom half of the glass door; the door was open and someone had walked through, and I was following this person..
6:15 saw another door open; I was with my kids and there was a man by the door and he said something like, “who’s sermon is this.”
6:18 In this dream I was standing outside, watching a scene; There was a storm coming, sensing it was windy, and I saw a lady quickly run to the building that had glass all along the side that I could see. I think the door was open and she was about to run in when my dream ended. I had a knowing that there were others there who were quickly running towards the building too.
6:23 I saw Bella’s ski pants and people coming into the entrance where I was standing. They were going to hang up their jackets.
6:26 I dreamt that I was standing at the kitchen sink with my kids dad, and either me or him were cleaning a big pot. The water was running and I saw him put his head underneath the sink faucet, wetting his hair.
6:31 “honest with me” I was really high up in a building that had many floors. It was like a multi level round parking lot and had a center in the middle where I sensed were two lawn chairs. (I don’t know if this was a parking lot) It was like a balcony going up so that people could see into the center of the building in any of the levels they were at. I had a feeling like there were some people on the floor/ground in the centre, sitting on chairs. I had a feeling like someone was asking someone if they were being “honest with me?” Yesterday I was talking with my kids dad, saying that my focus right now is to be home and pour into the kids, knowing they’re growing up so quickly (refocusing on what it means to be a mom and a wife..(believing this is the season I’m in). Also that God is preparing my heart for the ministry that one day I’ll be working in (preparing my heart and reading.). I said that during our marriage I’ve always done what he thought I should do (my focus was on that, subbing, which is not my calling from God so it’s been difficult to do because I don’t enjoy it); now I’m at an age where I need to focus on what the most important thing is, and that is to focus on nourishing and teaching our kids in the remainder time they have left in our home, and also to allow God to prepare my heart for working in the ministry.
7:05 I had a feeling of being outside in nature, like the kids were learning from being outside. I vaguely saw a kid had a birds nest (Fall) in their hands and had playfully tossed it onto the ground.
7:18 “could never do that” in my dream I saw someone had a wooden handle of some sort with a ribbon tied to it and kind of pushing it away. Oh please Holy Spirit, I want to come today, please help me come today.. I’m so desperate to come..
7:44 Come My darling…
I tried posting earlier but for some reason my website was’t loading, even though all other websites were loading fine. I’ve been pressing into the Holy Spirit, and I’m hoping and praying I’ll know what the correct thing to do is, and that I’ll be able to follow today… I’m volunteering at the World Cafe today. We’re going to the beach!!! 🫶🏻
Afternoon: Hey, I’m so thankful for Jesus and my closest friends.. I’m so honoured to be journeying together with them! I learned a few things today through my mistakes, and I’m beginning to enjoy this journey more than I thought I ever would! I’m looking forward to the next time!! At church there were a few times where I stood and prayed about a few things I needed to decide on and I believe I heard from the Holy Spirit, and I’m so excited about it! I prayed before choosing the snack afterward (right side), my gold earrings, and if I should have a Cinnamon Leite Latte or a Lavender London Fog; I chose the latte because that’s what I heard Jesus saying before, and I also sensed this from the Holy Spirit. I should have stopped to pray about which hand to grab the microphone.. I’m going to get better and I’m hoping I’ll get it next time!! We’re watching Fall Guy tonight! I’m learning to remember to pray before everything I need to decide on.
Evening: I’m sensing I made it? Remembering %100 and seeing an awesome victorious smile (Prov 25:11). During the sermon I all of a sudden got a small panic attack, something I’ve not had for a long time. As I was having it I was thinking that I must be doing something that’s aggravating the enemy, so I became determined to stay sitting on the seat. I was thinking the enemy wanted me to leave my seat and there was no way I was going to leave. The Holy Spirit used Bella to rest her head onto my shoulder and side of my face and I was completely comforted; God is so good! Also, when we were sitting in the second row, Bella asked me if I was going to sit in the first row after the person who was sitting there, left to get baptized and I thought that that was a good idea and I said yes, I’m going to do that!
I sat at one of the picnic tables (right side like in my dream, seeing the fish on the table) at Birds Hill by the Equestrian riding place (I love horses; they’re my favourite animal:) I rode a white horse many years ago in the BC mountains with a group from YFC. I got to ride it through a field and it galloped as fast as it could go and I remember it being so smooth like I was flying or gliding through the air. It really was one of the best experiences I’ve had.
I’m reminded of a dream I had years ago where I was on a beach and I reached deep in the sand to get a microphone. As soon as I held the microphone, the enemy grabbed it, but just as quickly Jesus was there and grabbed it from the enemy and gave it back to me. This afternoon at the beach I drank a bottle of water and put it open upside down into the sand (because of a recent dream and office). I at first put into the sand beside me on my left, and then I put it into the sand between my lawn chair and Lucas,’ thinking it was a connection. Later my kids dad came with the dog and we went for a walk in one of the trails. I’m hoping my interpretation is right… (I also went and took a red Alpha information card from the center info kiosk (Island). It’s so windy outside, reminds me of Holy Spirit!! I’m going to stand on the patio and enjoy it.. Blessings and Love….🫶🏻….