John 13:7
“Jesus replied, “You do not realize now what I am doing, but later you will understand.”
Father,
My daughter come, I love you -you are Mine.
Father, is there something you’d like to say to me?
Draw near to me my faithful one, and I will be near to you.
Father, I don’t know how to draw near to you today. All I want to do is rest my head on your shoulders and be near to you..
Come my darling, the time is near.
Jesus I wish I could have more alone time with you; I’m feeling like my heart is full yet completely dry.
Come my daughter and rest; all is well with you.
Reflection:
Happy Monday!!! I was so glad to be able to have a cappuccino with vanilla flavouring yesterday at church -I missed it!! This morning at Shopgym my lower back started to hurt even before lifting, so I just took it slow and I still managed to back-squat 125lbs. Back squats have always been one of my favourite things to do -my back still hurts:( Lately I haven’t had the time I’ve needed to spend with Jesus and I really really need more time with him. It’s kind of funny that my feelings go so deep yet in my dream last night I was cleaning the toilet with someone -I’d much rather be doing something else than clean the toilet! I didn’t see who it was, only their arm as they were putting toilet cleaner around by the white inner rim. Before this a woman had cleaned the toilet bowl with fresh water several times, swirling the water around and around it like we can do with a regular bowl. I saw that every time she put fresh water into it and began swirling it around, it would clean the bowl more and more. Then the scene had changed where I was cleaning it with another person; I had the brush in my hand but I was watching the other person squirt cleaner onto the inner part of the white rim. Then I saw so many bubbles that it was rounded and came up high over the top of the rim of the toilet. I don’t know specifically but normally going to the bathroom represents relieving oneself of something emotionally negative, so cleaning the toilet itself I’m not sure about. Writing is always a way for me to release some of the stress I’m carrying; I’m just sensing a transition coming.
My time with Jesus on this journey we’ve been on has been the most amazing time of my life. This adventure itself has been both stressful and stress-relieving at the same time for me. God is just so amazing that the way he does things I can hardly even describe. My time with Jesus on this journey has been the most romantic, stressful, heartbreaking, and passionate one I’ll ever be on in my life, and I’m so glad that Jesus will always be with me; we’ve been through so much together that the bond of love couldn’t help but grow deep. A big part of that is because of the length of the journey has been so long. I can hardly believe the things we’ve talked about and the things Jesus has led me to do. I can say with certainty that having walked this long walk with Jesus, I know I love him because I can feel something tangible ignite in my heart every time I think about him.. I know I’m in love with him because I can hardly wait to spend time with him everyday as I write and reflect on what the Lord is doing. I know I’m in love with him because of how I can open my heart for the world to see, but the most important thing is that he sees my heart and it doesn’t matter who else is watching. I can do this because I trust God and I love Him with all my heart; he’s shown me that he has the best for me and that in his best, I never need to settle. I love Jesus and I trust him with all my heart. I know this is love because the only way to connect is through the Holy Spirit, and the Holy Spirit is truth. Our foundation has been growing only through God/Love -this has been our walk. Because of this we’ve been walking together through the Holy Spirit, and it’s only through the Holy Spirit where true intimacy is grown. Jesus has made room for me and my mistakes, and he still loves me. He’s shown me that true love preserves me as I step out in faith. Jesus my husband really is kind, and I’m so thankful for that.. I only know what love is because of Jesus, and I’m so very thankful…❤️🔥