Never Alone

My Father, You know me… When I think of you in heaven, the greatness of who you are, and you knowing me -it’s just too great for me to fully fathom. Last night in one of the dreams you gave me, I was quickly going to run around to the other side of the lake to do something when I saw that a calm white mist had covered where I was going to run, and I knew that I wouldn’t have enough time to do what I had wanted to do (I’m not sure what that was). Then as I looked across the lake, I saw black mist propelling itself forward quickly like fingers eager to grasp. It was coming towards me so quickly and I immediately began to run to my house to take shelter, closing and locking doors behind me as I ran as quickly as I could towards the stairs to go up. When I was by the stairs I saw that the black mist had already entered my house and was close by the stairs. The black mist had come and there was nothing I could do to stop it. My sister who represents “the right way to go,” was waiting for me upstairs. My Father, please come, I don’t know how much longer I can take this. Yet I remember hearing that you showed up, that you had come, so I take comfort in that. You are near and I’ll be okay.

My sweet daughter -I have come and you are mine. I love you greatly, and all is well with you. Rest, knowing that I am near to you -you are never alone. 

Reflection: 

Right before I dreamt about the fog, I saw a lady close to the lake, who was getting ready to run into the water and swim the length of the lake, right in the middle of the lake where it was the roughest and deepest. The lake reminds me of a river because of how long it is. It was like at the olympic games where she was swimming for her country. Her country had made it tough on purpose to see who could do it. 

At the same time that I was running into my house from the black fog, I was also running from two people who were looking for me. I heard them say to each other that they think they found the house (my house). So I quickly ran from the lake to the house, locking every door I went through. Right by the stairs was the front door that had a screen door which I locked, and also another door which I tried to lock, but in my panic I couldn’t lock that door and started to run up the stairs, but I stopped and thought I’d try again only to see that one of the two people were putting their arm through the glass part of the door because the glass was gone -they had their hand in the door lock -I didn’t see the second door I couldn’t quite lock. Then I saw the black fog had already come into the house beside the stairs I needed to run up. I’m not sure if this represents my recording, that I had tried recording but couldn’t. Now I’m going to try again tomorrow; I don’t see anything stopping me from that but my heart is guarded, knowing the enemy doesn’t want me doing that. 

In the second dream I was standing in my house and there was a group of people, adults that had an agenda for me and my kids. My kids were upstairs but then they were with me and I saw that the people had given them a needle of some sort, on their heel or leg. I was so fed up that I yelled as loud as I could, “stop! I need to know what is going on!” I yelled this twice, pausing between each word to make sure they heard me. As I was yelling this, a lady from our church who has the same name as me but spelled a bit different, came walking through the door and into the middle of the group of people. She was smiling at me, eyes locked together and held, and as she walked, it was like everyone moved for her because she walked without going around people, like the Lord was moving them out of her way. I felt she had my back and that she was really proud of me. I felt like we were a team. 

Right at the end, all the noise and stiff-necked people were gone and I had a sense of quietness around me. I was holding my baby and felt my baby getting heavier like strength was leaving me, and as I started collapsing to the floor, I handed my baby to someone standing right in front of me and they gently took it. Having said all of that, I think that the enemy is always in pursuit of me, and I know that one day I’ll be able to have the rest I need. But I’m feeling that I’m okay; I’m really sensing his nearness warming my heart. In my heart I’ve taken a seat across from him at the table, so I’m really praying that tomorrow will go well. I’m glad that he’s really the only audience I have because I’m comfortable learning in front of him, knowing he loves me so much!