Psalm 36:5,6
“Your love, O Lord, reaches to the heavens, your faithfulness to the skies. Your righteousness is like the mighty mountains, your justice like the great deep…”
My Father, thank-you for all your goodness in my life. Thank-you for your great love that welcomes me, waking up inside of me.
You’re welcome my faithful daughter.
Father, you are love; please come and grow in my heart more deeply so that I will know you more. You’ve done so much in my heart, healing me in areas where I didn’t know needed healing, and transforming me to be more like you. I want to be more like you Father, so please continue to do your work in me.
Caroline my daughter, you are Mine and I am well pleased with you. Come, the time is right -I am near to you.
Father God, you created the world and the starry hosts. You are the author of life and the author of me. I want what you want for my life -your word always has the final say, and I’m so glad because you are love.
Caroline my faithful daughter, rest; I bless you today.
Reflection:
This morning in my 5am crossfit class we did power cleans (I did 85 lbs) for the strength part of it, then we rowed 1500meters and 30 overhead squats for time. I’ve always had a difficult time with overhead squats, so today I just used a light bar with no added weights, just to get my form right. I’m having so much fun in my classes.. this is something I really enjoy. We went to the Silver-city theatre two days ago and saw Avatar; the Way of Water, and thought if was a good movie, though super intense! Last night I had only been sleeping for not even an hour when I woke up and had the words, “Simply come, go into the library.” I don’t know if the Lord means this literally, or if he’s leading me to begin reading more. The only library I have access too is my church library on Sundays, but I do have books at home that I need to read too. Then shortly after two I woke up with the thought that I need to hold something loosely in my hand. I don’t know what this is referring too, and it may not be important. If it is important then I’m praying that the Holy Spirit will bring this to mind if I’m holding too tightly onto something that I need to let go of.
I dreamt that I was in a public place, and I had a ring of keys in my hand. There were some things on this ring that weren’t keys and I was fiddling with it to find the key that was attached. There could have been a few keys on the one ring I’m not sure. Then I had put the key into the lock of what could have been a glass door and I was turning the key right to unlock the door. It was difficult to turn the key at first so I thought it was the wrong key, but then as I continued putting pressure on it to turn, it slowly turned all the way. Then I noticed that someone was standing close beside me, really excited that wanted to take what was inside the cabinet as soon as I had opened up the door, and I stopped and told them that next time I was going to get one of my buddies to come and stand next to me (for protection) if they didn’t leave. I had glanced to the side and saw one of my friends standing, talking to someone. Then the scene changed where the lock was the size of a round dinner plate, reminding me of a clock, laying on a table or something. It was like the big hand was something wide and wooden that I needed to push in order for it to go around like the big hand of a clock would. It was really difficult but as I was pushing it with both my hands and using all my strength, I managed to push it further, about ten minutes of space before the top of the hour. It didn’t have numbers on it; it just reminded me of a clock but it was a lock that I was turning. I’m not sure exactly but with the Lords help, he’s always helping me push through the difficulties of my life.
In this next dream I was climbing a fence and jumping sideways, always having a good grip on it. The fence was one of those fences that many schools have around their yard where the metal is linked together. This fence was kind of going around a house, maybe only on one side I’m not sure. I saw inside a small storage/attic area where the door to the adic was in the outside of the house close to the roof. The attic door was open and I saw that it was dark inside and saw two black thin cardboard boxes leaning up together against something. My purpose in this dream was to climb and go along the fence to get close to the house in order to retrieve something, but I left the two boxes behind (it didn’t feel like I needed to get them) and I easily jumped to another part of the fence a bit further and climbed onto the roof and was about to open another storage or attic area. Then the scene changed where I was inside the house and Lucas was very impressed by how easily I had manoeuvred along the fence:) I believe that in a way I’ve been a prisoner, and as the Lord is waking me up with his love as our relationship grows, I’m gaining more spiritual freedom.
In this next dream I was underneath the covers with Jesus as my husband, and in my dream I took my pj’s off, got completely undressed, desiring to be more intimate with him. Then I was laying on my back and I saw underneath the covers and that it was as light as daylight underneath and knew that I was completely seen, and I was perfectly fine with that. This dream represents that I’ve completely exposed myself to the Lord and I’m not hiding anything from him. Also, that despite my flaws, I’m more than okay that he sees me as I am because I’m trusting in him. I don’t need to preserve myself (which would cause me to step back) because he preserves me as he sees me as I am. Yesterday I came across a picture of Jesus, one that I had seen many times before, but this time as I looked at his face I could actually FEEL love!! I’ve felt a passionate love all this time but when I was looking at his picture, love actually landed on him that came from deep within my heart. This is so bizar I can’t even explain it. The kind of love connection when you know someone because of having spent a lot of time together and loving that person because of what you’ve learned about them; having made memories with that person through talking deeply about the most important things in life. I haven’t spent time with Jesus in person of course, but through the Holy Spirit we’ve made many memories together, including having gone through many difficult moments where I thought I just couldn’t keep going. Going through a long and difficult journey together, always growing together because we are for one another, one can’t help but know the other person intimately, and this is also true with journeying together with Jesus; the more time we spend with him, the more we can see that we can completely trust him, which grows our love for him because as we journey together, he also opens our eyes of understanding of how much he’s always loved us, and this makes me sob. I’m overwhelmed by how much Jesus loves me, and I’m overwhelmed at the thought that he preserves me… this is what makes me sob -this is the turning point for me to truly see and truly know.
In this last dream I was standing outside, looking at someone who was standing inside a telephone booth. There was something on top of it that I sensed was the engine or the thing that made the phone booth fly. Then all of a sudden the phone booth began to go up and another person quickly went in, and it took them high into the sky. I’m not sure exactly what this represents, but I believe it has to do with prayer and intimacy with Jesus.
Yesterday I didn’t post, but I had dreamt that I was craving blueberry pie and that I was beginning to get the ingredients to put the recipe together. I had also dreamt that someone said the names of my Korean friend and her family, but they didn’t say their names right so I corrected them, one at a time. We’re getting together with them today so I’m making a blueberry pie to bring along for dessert with french vanilla ice cream -hmm so good! I had also dreamt that I was beginning to gather my sister Cathy’s dark clothes to wash. All in all, I need to say that love is coming to life in me; love has been waking me up in my journey with Jesus and I’m so thankful.. I always thought that I was truly living because I was a christian, which should be true for every christian, but having walked the journey I’ve walked, I can say that I was an asleep child of God. I didn’t know I was asleep because I was asleep! Love is life and is alive in me!! Blessings:)☕️