Galatians 6:8,9
“The one who sows to please his sinful nature, from that nature will reap destruction; the one who sows to please the Spirit, from the Spirit will reap eternal life. Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.”
Conversation
Daddy, I love you. I praise Your name when I’m on the mountain and in the valley. You are my hope and firm foundation. I love You and worship You so much!
I love you Caroline. You are Mine and I am well pleased with you. Come, I have a word for you today. If you want to speak, you need to practice. Your faith is built on a strong foundation, and now it’s time to speak.
Daddy, thinking about what you told me through my dreams and what I’m sensing from them, I know that I’m finally ready. I’m ready to forget the former things and step into Your awesome plan for my life.
Come My daughter, My bride. You’ve been faithful and So Am I. Come deeper in My darling, for I am yours and you are Mine.
Reflection
Hello everyone, welcome to today’s page in my journal! The Lord wakes me up most nights at certain times, which I sometimes don’t know the meaning of but other times I do, and it’s such a great comfort to my heart. I absolutely love sharing what God is doing in my heart, hoping it’ll inspire you to spend time with God everyday and grow the most fulfilling relationship with Him!
This morning when I woke up I had these lyrics in my heart, “I put my faith in Jesus, my anchor to the ground. He is my hope and firm foundation, He’ll never let me down.” Last night I dreamt something almost right away when I fell asleep and I’m so sad to say that I fell back asleep and forget what it is. But I vaguely remember that it was about biking and that I had attempted something and got it right after I had attempted it the first time. The other night I also had sensed something about biking.
Last night I dreamt that my dad wanted to show me that he was strong enough to hold me over a cliff with one arm and bring me back to safety, back onto the side of the mountain. He had already tried one time before and failed, and wanted to try again, so while we were there he quickly grabbed my hand and held me over a cliff (I was dangling in midair). As he was holding my left hand (I saw that his arm was straight out), my hand began to slip and I fell. Then he wanted to try again for the third time, so while we were on the cliff he quickly grabbed my hand again and held me out. I think this time he was also leaning more into the air above the cliff so he lost his grip on the mountain and we both fell. There was a house built on the side of the mountain which I didn’t clearly see, but I knew that my sister Connie was inside somewhere, and my mom was standing on the side of the cliff watching us. So when my dad lost his grip with the hand that was holding onto the mountain and when we began to fall, I saw my dad’s reaction on his face; it was a realization moment that how he was doing it was wrong. After seeing his reaction I quickly said my goodbyes and called out, “Bye Connie, bye mom!” I knew that this time we would fall to our death and I was calmly ready and accepted it. The Lord is showing me that I died to myself.
Then there was a scene where my dad and I were on a very narrow trail on the side of the mountain and there was a gap in the trail where we’d fall to our death if we didn’t strategize about how to get across. In waking life we’d easily be able to step across, but in my dream we watched (from above somehow) a woman carefully maneuver across by laying on her back (soaking during worship) and putting her legs across the gap. In my dream it was important for us to know that it was all about balance, not about how strong we are. This scene happened after my last fall to show that my dad (who represents my spiritual work/income/putting messages together and preaching) had an aha moment about the right way of putting messages together and preaching. My thought about balance and not relying on how strong we are is that every part about putting a message together is important; writing, practicing and presenting it, is work which is strength, but relying on the Holy Spirit to guide us through it all is the balancing part; because we can’t do it in our own strength, we need to be guided by the Holy Spirit in every aspect of it, totally surrendering, which brings it all into balance. ☺️
Same dream but in the next scene I was on my knees with my head in my hands (I think) which were on the floor, in a room that had other people in it. (I had seen two people, face to face, talking and smiling at each other; I saw the guys face, and she was facing him.). I knew I had died and that I was alive in heaven or in another world, so I deeply groaned and groaned from the bottom of my soul, missing those I loved. There was a woman who walked to me, and then I had sat up and I saw she was holding in front of me a small opened box that was filled with lip-balm, standing straight up. She said something like why I hadn’t included an official one in the box. In my dream to me this meant that I didn’t put a lip-balm in it that represented having a degree of some sort, so I told her that I didn’t put it in there (my lip balm that represented having an official University degree) because I didn’t want to bring it into the casket with me. I’m so relieved that God could finally show me that I had died to self, which is putting off the “old man” and putting on the new. I’m finally entering into where God has been leading me to go, deeper into my calling.
Then the scene changed were I was back among the people I loved!! God had risen me back to life!! I was in a room that had many people in it, including my mom and others that I loved, and I was telling someone to call my dad and tell him that I was Alive so that when he saw me he wouldn’t have a heart-attack. Then a lady came into the room and I think it was my mom who told her who I was (because everyone knew that I had died) and said my name, and the lady said, “I know,” and something like she sees me on set all the time! It felt like she was the producer of the film. Then I had a knowing that I was “the star of the show,” and that they were making a movie about my life. Then as I was standing there or leaning up against a counter I’m not sure, I saw someone with a black camera come right in front of me and take my photo. I saw the round camera lens as he was focusing to take my photo. There was another person with a camera close by. There was excitement in the room and I was so calm about it all. The thought that my story with Jesus will be famous one day continues to cross my mind… I know that our story is really unique and full of God’s Glory; it’s our testimony about God drawing us close to his heart and my heart close to Jesus’ heart. He’s led me to put off the old and put on the new, putting off who I thought I was to putting on who God says I am. God has led me one step at a time to die to myself so that God could raise me back to life, the kind of life he designed me to have as I walk in my calling and purpose. This has been a journey of growing in trust and belief while restoring my heart to its rightful place, full of value and worth. I declare that I am finally free! I believe that with walking with Jesus for so long, we’ve gotten to know one another really well, and I put my trust and faith in Jesus 100%!!!
I had another quick dream where I was standing outside near a house. I was looking into the parking lot that had several cars parked beside each-other, and it was sunny outside. I saw two adult people, saw only their heads because they were between the cars, and all the long(ish) messy hair on both their heads that were close together (forehead to forehead). I think one of them had blond hair. I had a knowing that one was a man and the other a woman, and then I turned and began walking towards the open door of the house. This speaks to me about being passionate with Jesus because of heart-intimate years-of-time spent together… This is what real intimacy is all about; the center and foundation of true intimacy is heart to heart with God Himself because God is Love. I believe that the closer a couple is to God, the closer they will be to each-other. In a separate dream I had a quick picture of someone urgently giving me a box of Kleenex. I’m going to run my 4k and then make beef stroganoff with rice, brown rice if we have. Tomorrow I’ll make black beans for Saturday and I’ll do some baking tomorrow too, not yet sure what. My usual go to for baking are chocolate chip banana muffins, which I’ll bake today. Many blessings…