“However, I consider my life worth nothing to me; my only aim is to finish the race and complete the task the Lord Jesus has given me -the task of testifying to the good news of God’s grace.” Acts 20:24
Conversation
Papa, I love You from the depth of my heart. I worship You with al that I am.
I love you My daughter. “Peace I leave with you; My peace I give you.” (John 14:27)
Papa, Jesus, thankYou for Your rich love; it transcends my deepest understanding.
“I’ve got a river of life flowing out of me. Makes the lame to walk and the blind to see. Opens prison doors lets the captives free. I’ve got a river of life flowing out of me. Spring up oh well, within my soul. Spring up oh well, and make me whole. Spring up oh well, and give to me, life abundantly.”
I love you My darling. All is complete; be at rest, for you are Mine.
“I love You Lord. For Your Mercies never fail me. All my days are held in Your hand. From the moment that I wake up, till I lay my head, I will sing of the Goodness of God. All my life You have been faithful. All my life You have been so, so Good. With every breath that I am able, I will sing, of the Goodness of God.”
Reflection
Hello and welcome to my Journal. Life in the valley can be very difficult, but we need to remember that God is always faithful. Right now I’m in a valley, being tested and pruned so that in God’s time I’ll be ready to walk out of this valley, Victorious! What I’ve been doing so I don’t stay in a place of despair is spending time with God and crying out to Him because I know He hears me and He loves me. I’m keeping on doing what He’s already asked me to do. I’m clinging onto hope because God is my firm foundation. God is faithful and I know that He will never let me down, and I’m going to stay faithful to Him. He has shown me His faithfulness more times than I can count, and I know His love through that. God gives me dreams and wakes me up at certain times. As you read my journal my hope is that even though I’m in a valley in my life, I hope you will be inspired to always keep your heart open to God no matter what’s going on in your life, because God is a God of Love and He always has a Good plan for our life. He knows how to lead us; we just need to trust Him and follow Him!
11:07 “Most people today are not being cleansed.” (Thinking about the heart)
2:49 “Jesus loves me.” I saw or sensed light blue and yellow. Song: “I always knew you could be like this, I saw flashes and glimpses before.. I always knew the day would come and now you’re walking through the door, when I see you again…
Papa what is it that You want my heart to know?
3:01 “That I love you.”
3:15 I love being with You Papa.
“I know you do My darling. I love being with you too. Come, rest, you are Mine.”
In my dream last night I was in my home (not my actual). It was big, spacious, beautiful and tidy, and I sensed someone living with me (always Jesus and the Holy Spirit). I went downstairs to make sure there was no one else in the house. While I was downstairs I saw someone who had come in through a short waterfall system, and I was immediately alarmed. He looked like a nice person with a smile on his face, so then I think I let it go. Then shortly after that I saw that three friends of mine in my dream were standing in front of me, showing me they were now friends with the person who had come into my home before (and by now I knew that this person was actually not my friend but had come to harm me), and I couldn’t believe that these friends had turned their back on me. This person who had come into my home through the waterway was keeping me captive. Then I was among other people and there was a person standing in front of me with one eye, and I mouthed the words in desperation, “Help Me!” Then I saw the intruder as a kid. Then I was in front of a file-cabinet and had the top drawer open, looking through the things that were in it. I saw my 7 Habits of Highly Effective People book and I was hoping the enemy wouldn’t find it because I wanted to keep it. We were hiring someone to manage our finances, not just to do the initial organization but for them to keep on doing it so we would be better organized with a better system then what I had been doing. In my dream I could see the value in that and agreed that it was a good thing.
7:25 “I’m on, top of the world again, it’s the only explanation I can find. It’s a love that I found..”
7:47 I woke up feeling Gods love burning in my heart.
7:56 “Create in me, a heart that is clean, cause I want to be, who You want me to be. Holy Spirit use me, overwhelm me, for Your glory.”
Last night while I was waiting for Bella to brush her teeth I fell asleep and I woke up with the word, anxiety, in my mind (9:38). I’m thinking the dream I had last night could be about that. This morning I’ve given it all to the Lord and I feel at peace in my heart. I listened to one of Craig Groeschel’s posts about not giving up because our journey’s not about us, it’s about God and His glory, and I felt totally released when I agreed in my heart about that. It’s not about me at all, and I’m completely in the arms of God/Jesus Christ, relying on His love for me. My life is not my own. I trust in God, my saviour the One, who will never fail.. He will never fail… ❤️🔥
This morning I was reading in the hammock and momentarily fell asleep and heard these words in my heart right before waking up at 12:42, “Let’s just describe the journey with Jesus.” I have so much peace in my heart… I’m really looking forward to Lucas’ baptism tomorrow, a very special event!!! I’m so thankful for Godly leadership in my life. About the dream about my finances, today I was reading from my Seven Principles for Making a Marriage Work book, and the page I began reading today was p2:10/2:11 about planning our Financial Future, and I thought how amazing our God is!! Blessings…
I finished reading the book at 10:42 this evening!!! I actually read the last paragraph in a hurry (10:41) but reread it so it was a genuine read, and when I was done it was 10:42. Yay!! I really needed to read this book and hadn’t read any other book like it. But I totally agree that when we sense something right away and talk about it, rather than letting it grow into something bigger will help our relationship very much. Love and Blessings… ❤️🔥
July 21: 2:11 “…when we fell in love. Darling just kiss me slow…
3:31 “…when we fell in love. Darling just kiss me slow…”
5:10 “…when we fell in love. Darling just kiss me slow…”
(Perfect, by Ed Sheeran)
I found a love, for me
Darling, just dive right in and follow my lead
Well, I found a girl, beautiful and sweet
Oh, I never knew you were the someone waiting for me
‘Cause we were just kids when we fell in love
Not knowing what it was
I will not give you up this time
But darling, just kiss me slow
Your heart is all I own
And in your eyes, you’re holding mine
Baby, I’m dancing in the dark
With you between my arms
Barefoot on the grass
Listening to our favourite song
When you said you looked a mess
I whispered underneath my breath
But you heard it
Darling, you look perfect tonight
Well, I found a woman, stronger than anyone I know
She shares my dreams, I hope that someday I’ll share her home
I found a lover, to carry more than just my secrets
To carry love, to carry children of our own
We are still kids, but we’re so in love
Fighting against all odds
I know we’ll be alright this time
Darling, just hold my hand
Be my girl, I’ll be your man
I see my future in your eyes
Baby, I’m dancing in the dark
With you between my arms
Barefoot on the grass
Listening to our favorite song
When I saw you in that dress, looking so beautiful
I don’t deserve this
Darling, you look perfect tonight
Baby, I’m dancing in the dark
With you between my arms
Barefoot on the grass
Listening to our favorite song
I have faith in what I see
Now I know I have met an angel in person
And she looks perfect
I don’t deserve this
You look perfect tonight
❤️🔥❤️🔥 I love you Jesus… I am Your bride and You are mine….
During my prayer time this morning, a fell asleep a few times:
8:22 I saw the underneath part of the truck (right on top of me but further up into the air). I saw the bar/pipe that goes across that connects the two back wheels. My husband (my kids dad) was right in front of me (I saw his face, looking earnestly at me) and said something about moving in sync (with each other). (Holy Spirit please help me understand)
8:44 A youthful woman excitedly said something about Micky Mouse (a mike? Microphone?) while standing outside. I sensed she was in some kind of theme park. I think I saw a square black picture frame, but I’m not sure.
8:49 I saw a white string that went straight through someone’s head and then it was being pulled back out. I saw the last few inches of the string, and it had blood on it. Then a male teenager was standing right in front of me and said that I had a call on my life. In the dream that I walked to a table and said my name, my name was on the list and I needed to testify. I know that I’m not supposed to get re-baptized, so I’m not sure when I need to be a witness. I believe this represents speaking and leading in general. As soon as I got to church I realized how important it was for me to wear a skirt. I had dreamt about it, and because we were in a rush I didn’t have time to iron, so I thought the pants I wore was like a skirt and put them on instead. My heart is filled with regret… But there was one thing I think I got right which was to stay on stage for the whole thing. With the ice cream they just handed me one, so I was relieved I didn’t need to choose. But when I saw someone had vanilla, I wished I would have asked because they gave me a chocolate one.
This morning one of the first things I heard which I didn’t write down because I forgot and because I wasn’t sure if it was important; I heard “Grace Witherspoon” (Reese Witherspoon). I believe that God is giving me grace about today. I need to testify here that God is such a God of love and grace.. He is such a gentleman that He whispers and gives soft nudges through the Holy Spirit when He reminds us of things and when He leads. He breathes life in me when I stumble and fall, and helps me up with such tenderness and care. I’m so thankful that I get to be His daughter, and that He loves me so much that He always makes a new plan when I mess up the one He was leading me in. I totally don’t deserve His love and grace and I’m so thankful to Him for them.
Something that I’m reminded of is that after an event, I don’t know it all. Before an event I know that I don’t know it all.. very little actually, and the opposite is true that afterwards when I think I mess up every time, I think that I know it all and then because I think I didn’t make it, I get so depressed. This changes today. I never know it all, and that’s why I always need to keep my heart open, trusting God and His goodness for me, being optimistic and joyful in every circumstance. This is easier said than done, but it’s a goal I have made in my heart. God is always good.. He is such a good good Father, and I’m learning to love Him more than my desire to know what’s best for my life. I’m going to begin a written journal (rather than just writing it in my iPad) and write down what I sense God is saying for me to do, and that way it will be easier and I won’t forget. I’m clinging onto hope that God is giving me grace again… I keep hearing that it’s not too late, and my heart is in anguish, hoping I’m hearing right… Love and blessings…