“A man cannot be established through wickedness, but the righteous cannot be uprooted. A wife of noble character is her husbands crown…” -Proverbs 12:3,4
Conversation
Papa
My daughter, I love you -you are Mine.
Papa I worship You. I love You and I’m so thankful for You. Papa my heart is open to You. I want Your will for my life, and I want this journey with You in this pocket of time to take as long as You wish. It’s difficult being here but I trust You. You are perfect and Your will for me is perfect. I know You are transforming my heart and preparing me for whats next. You will sustain me; You will sustain what You’ve started and I let go of wanting Your plans to go my way (wanting You to come today). I repent of being impatient and self-absorbed. Please forgive me. I want what You want Papa -I want Your best plan for me, for us. I give myself to You again today. I am Yours.
Come My faithful one, you are right; I have good plans for you. Do not become discouraged. Keep looking up to Me, for I am your rest.
Reflection
Hello and welcome to today’s page in my journal! The Lord wakes me up most nights at certain times after He’s given me a dream, which I sometimes don’t know the meaning of but other times I do, and it’s such a great comfort to my heart. I absolutely love sharing what God is doing in my heart, hoping it’ll inspire you to spend time with God everyday and grow the most fulfilling relationship with Him. For the past while God has been taking me through a spiritual shower. I believe He’s preparing me for what’s coming up next. He’s purifying my heart so that my heart is clean before Him. It also clears the way for me to hear Holy Spirit better when there’s no mess in the way. I record the times when God says something to me because even in that, there’s meaning. Blessings.
1:39 I dreamt that I was dating someone and we had slept together. Then I wondered why I so easily had slept with him when I knew it was wrong because we weren’t married (not one in heart?) (In waking life I’ve never been with anyone other than my husband, on our wedding night). So then I thought that I couldn’t do that anymore. Then the scene changed where I had just gotten married (I don’t think this was the same person.). I had told my new husband about myself when we were dating. Then I remembered that I hadn’t told him that I was a Christian! So then he was right in front of me; his face was right in front of mine when I said, “I forgot to tell you that I’m a Christian!” And he was so surprised! (I sensed this morning that this represents that I need to hold up my hand at church when my pastor invites people to accept Jesus as their Saviour. (I did raise my hand… -I needed to raise my hand because I felt like this was the first time (in recent days) that I really understood God’s grace for me through Jesus dying on the cross for me. I accepted Jesus into my heart when I was a little girl but I never really understood how much I needed God’s grace until recently, and it was because of my journey with the Lord and how He’s been working in my heart that I can understand this. He really has done so much for me). In my dream I had a feeling like he wasn’t a Christian, but also so amazed with how much more mature he is than me. In waking life sometimes I feel like I don’t really know anything. I had hidden my heart away, laying dormant for so long because of trauma that my heart has been thawing and warming up as I’ve been learning how to discern the voice of the Holy Spirit. Then in my dream I said something to reassure him, like I was a very easygoing and fun-loving Christian, and we both had smiles on our faces, completely in love. Then I also said that I have a Mennonite background (yes, I have to say that I have a Mennonite background.. I’ve always felt ashamed about that (though not anymore I don’t think), always feeling like we were the underdog in society.) Then he was standing on the floor looking up at me. I was sitting up high like I was sitting on the ledge of an attic. It was a circular ledge/opening. He was going to his office, and I was going to get the keys to drive him there when he told me that he was staying late, indicating that I didn’t need to drive him but that he would drive. I understood and then the dream ended. I’m going to be praying and pondering about this.
Then the scene changed where I was standing on the main floor in the entrance of our house and the front door was all the way open. There was a lady close to me who had just handed me the key to the Red Ferrari (I don’t know if it was a Ferrari or a Lamborghini; it was a really expensive, low sitting longer car) sitting on the side of the road in front of our house. I was holding the key in my hand (it was made of real authentic metal and had a round shape that was the size of the palm of my hand.). She said something to me about it and I had no idea what she was referring to, and someone pointed it out that she was telling me that the key was made out of real authentic metal, and as they were telling me this is when I looked down at my hands and saw that I was holding it. I believe this represents that God is giving me a gift of anointing or authority that will help me do His will.
Another quick dream where I was in my house and Bella was in another house down the road. She had walked to my house to bring me something. It wasn’t the right thing so she was going to walk back and get the real thing. I knew it was dark outside because it was late or it was night, so I was going to bring her back home. I’m not sure what this dream represents.
I woke up at 5:57 (no alarm) with the beginning lyrics of this song in my heart, “Before I spoke a word, You were singing over me. You have been so, so good to me. Before I took a breath, You breathed Your life in me. You have been so, so kind to me. Oh the overwhelming, never ending, reckless love of God. O it chases me down, fights till I’m found, leaves the ninety nine. I couldn’t earn it, I don’t deserve it, still You give Yourself away. O the overwhelming, never ending, reckless love of God. When I was Your foe, still Your love fought for me. You have been so, so good to me. When I felt no worth, you paid it all for me. You have been so, so kind to me. Bridge: There’s no shadow You won’t light up, mountain You won’t climb up, coming after me. There’s no wall You won’t kick down, lie you won’t tear down, coming after me. O the overwhelming, never ending, reckless love of God. O it chases me down, fights till I’m found, leaves the ninety nine. I couldn’t earn it, I don’t deserve it, still You give Yourself away. O the overwhelming, never ending, reckless love of God.” This song I feel was written for me with how much God/Jesus have been pursuing me, and I’m always so thankful..
Then I woke up at 7:10 (not with an alarm) and heard these words in my heart, “Delta Dawn what’s that flower you have on. Could it be a faded rose from days gone by? And did I hear you say, he’s gonna meet you here today, to take you to his mansion in the sky.”
I dreamt that I was in the passenger side of a vehicle and we were in a busy city. As we were driving by people I saw everyone but they were all blurry. In waking life the last time I dreamt about “seeing,” my eyes were open but all I saw was black, like I was blind. So in comparison to that I could see much better. I’m hoping God will open up my spiritual vision soon. Maybe I’m still not fully understanding God’s grace in my life? In waking life I feel like I need new glasses again! In waking life I’m sensing to get a new purse/black and white plaid (In one of my dreams I had gotten a new purse.). Today I wore my plaid skirt and plaid jacket. I know they didn’t match but I had a dream awhile ago that I was wearing a plaid black and white dress. I don’t have one so that’s why I wore both today. I also wanted to step out in obedience, wanting my fear of God to be greater than my fear of man (worrying about what they think), so this is what the two represented (besides everything all at once). I think it also meant that the two separate pieces became one, outfit. Later I was also thinking about this, that I had put the two separate boxes of wraps into one of the boxes before putting the box in the fridge. I’m feeling like I should have taken one of the wraps and I wish I would have. I was hungry but I didn’t think that that could represent my dream about following Jesus my husband, going into the kitchen and refilling my water bottle. We had just come from Subway (I had a 6inch steak and cheese on Italian bread) so that’s why I hadn’t taken a wrap, but later I was hungry and should have gone to get one. My back was a lot better today! I need to give time this week to get the ‘home’ part of our taxes together. Jeanette invited me and my kids to go to her house on Thursday to do another painting. I’m hoping to finish my sunrise painting before then. I’m sensing not to go to Shopgym tomorrow but to run instead. I’m not sure if I’m hearing from the Lord or if this is my will. I’m thinking that if this is from the Lord, it could have something to do with my back; I’d be doing front squats tomorrow and a bunch of other things. I know the Lord will correct me if I’m wrong. I’d actually love to have a break from Shopgym this week and focus on running instead, but whatever the Lord wants I will do. I opened my Bible to the verses above. Goodnight -many blessings…🙏🏻