Dad, I feel like my heart is raw, yet because I’m on a very steep hill, I can’t stop. I’ve learned that when I stop, dark clouds begin to gather overtop which will influence me in a negative way. When I stop, intending to rest, I’m actually in danger of falling. I feel like I’m being pushed and led at the same time to go higher, and I’m nearly at the top. I’ve also learned from you Lord that I need to get my rest from you as I’m walking with you -this is when and how I rest.
This is all true my dear one. You have a teachable spirit. Remain teachable, never giving up, for I am near to you, always.
Dad, I sense that when I stop, I’m being led by my emotions, and not stopping is more important than I realize in this time frame. I’m sensing there’s so much at stake.
My faithful one, there is, and it’s you.
Father, I feel like I’m fighting for my life, the life I’m meant to live. If I’m in the midst of breaking a shell around me in order to live in the freedom of who you know I am, then I declare your freedom over me in Jesus name. Help me to walk in more freedom as we walk the remainder of this journey Jesus.
Come my darling, you’re okay..all is well with you. You are mine.
I’m your daughter and I’m glad. I pray for a stronger anointing and freedom to speak as you lead me. I need to walk with deep joy Holy Spirit, so I ask for your joy to help me in my walk with you.
Caroline, don’t doubt my word to you. Don’t allow doubt to take root in your thinking. My words are always true and they won’t come back to me without having done what I’ve spoken. By not allowing doubt into your mind, you’re allowing joy to come into your heart; it’s then that you’ve made room for it -my joy is your strength.
Father, you always have the answers to all my problems, even potential problems -thank-you. I pray that you will continue to make a way where there is no way, in all the aspects of my life. Help me to drink deeply from the well Holy Spirit.
I live in your heart my dear one. Never give up.
I won’t.
Reflection:
The other day I dreamt that my daughter was laying down with her feet pointing towards the top of the hill, and because it was such a steep hill, she was in danger of falling. I saw this from above and saw how steep the hill was, and she was nearly at the top. I desperately wanted to go talk with her and then I was right in front of her, scolding her harshly. I think she represent the learning part of who I am. As I journey with the Lord, God shows me the truth about things and I learn from him the better way to walk. I believe that God is telling me that my feet are pointed in the right direction but I need to keep walking or I won’t reach the top. And I need to be resting in the Lord as we walk because stopping to rest is actually following my emotions, and then dark clouds have time to gather overtop which will affect me negatively.
Friday I intentionally took time to be with my sister because I started to feel depleted. After breakfast at Clementines, we went to the Forks and had a latte. After the barista prepared a beautiful design at the top, he put a lid on it and handed it to me. I just couldn’t take a sip with the lid on because it would ruin the design, so I took the lid off and enjoyed my latte. It reminded me of my journey with the Lord and how difficult it’s been to walk as I’m in the deep end with the Lord. Our journey is difficult but there’s also beauty in it. I’ve definitely not made it beautiful because of how I’ve resisted, but God is having his way with me. It’s his leading in my life that I need to allow others to see, so if I’m going to allow others to see Gods beauty in my life, I can’t put a lid on it!