Isaiah 44:1-3
“But now listen, O Jacob, my servant, Israel, whom I have chosen. This is what the Lord says – he who made you, who formed you in the womb, and who will help you: Do not be afraid, O Jacob, my servant, Jeshurun, whim I have chosen. For I will pour water on the thirsty land, and streams on the dry ground; I will pour out my Spirit on your offspring, and my blessing on your descendants.”
My Father,
My faithful one, I love you -you are Mine.
Father, I just want to soak in your presence today. I love you so very much.
Come, you are welcome.
Father, I want to know you more. Open my eyes Lord, I want to see you more. Open my ears Lord, I want to hear you more. I want to know what it smells like to be in your presence, and I would love to taste something from heaven. I want more of you Lord, help me draw closer to you. I’m resting in you.
Caroline my daughter come, for I am well pleased with you.
Reflection:
Hey welcome back! This morning the verse above really spoke to me as I replaced the names in the verse with my name.. it became so personal. Last night I woke up at 2:39 with the lyrics, “…doesn’t it sound like, sound like, sound like heaven….” I didn’t write it down until morning, thinking I’d remember the lyrics, but I’m pretty sure these were what I heard in my heart. Then I awoke at 3:17 with the lyrics, “Come a little closer, stay a little longer…” Then I dreamt about Tony Stark without his armor on. We were driving past a small road that was beside the one we were on, and along that road was a graveyard, but I didn’t see gravestones, I only saw the places where people put their loved ones ashes. Then we were in Tony Starks home and I had a knowing that he had been in a time of grieving, and now his grieving time was done; the day we were in was the last day of his grieving, and in this last day his grieving time was done. We were inside his house and I saw that we had walked to the back part of his house. I could see his backyard; I felt like this was a more personal space and that normally people would only see the front as they drove by. I saw that there were many windows, and as we had walked there, I saw him looking at me as we faced the windows. He was a few meters away. Then we were right beside each other and he picked me up in his arms and then I had my legs around his waist. I believe this represents intimacy with Jesus and that I’m fully resting in him; allowing myself to be completely open in my heart to him and that I am fully his. Then he asked me if I was on any medication, to which I replied no. In waking life I’m not on any medication. The only things I normally take everyday are a probiotic and a few cranberry pills. I used to make combucha which took the place of probiotics, but I think I had too much cumbucha so now I need to stay away from it because it does the opposite where it would cause yeast infections. I try and stay away from anything that’s been preserved with vinegar because of that. In the last week I’ve noticed that the probiotics Im taking right now have helped a lot, so because of that Im thinking vinegar won’t affect me as much, we’ll see. Then in my dream I vaguely saw him and someone in his convertible car, and I think he said something like, “This is my nanny moment…” This part was very vague. Changing the subject, recently I saw on a video a toddler walking around at a wedding, and he had the cutest beige pants and blue shirt on, so adorable! When my kids were toddlers I loved dressing them up!!! I went to Shopgym this morning and my knee did better as I worked out, so that’s good! We did Barbell Front Rack Reverse Lunges. I worked up to 85lbs. 5X5 -the last two sets were with 85lbs. Then we did every two min with one min break of Thrusters. 12 reps,9 reps,7,5. In the two min the gals rowed 15 calories, the guys rowed 20. We needed to add weight as our reps went down but I stayed the same because of my knee. It felt fine but I didn’t want to push it. I’m going to begin only going to shopgym twice a week and then also run twice a week at the track.
Thursday: Today I worked on my message during my time with God, and in the evening we went to go hear Lucas and his band play for the grade six play at the middle school -I’m so proud of him:) Right before I woke up this morning I heard in my heart, “three teared cake.” I’m not sure what this represents. My leg is getting better.. Right before leaving for the city on Wed., I had light purple pants on with my new shirt, and Bella said something like it didn’t look like something I should wear for youth. So because I wasn’t sure about it, I changed back into jeans. But as I was looking in my closet for something before I changed, I heard the word, “courage” in my heart and I knew that was the Lord. But I kept on changing. Then later I wanted to put my feet up but I didn’t:( Later I thought it was a courage moment as well. I think I could just cry, why am I like this? One day I’ll get passed this. Going to Shopgym in the morning. I’m wondering though if my dream meant for me to plan to talk with my mentor or one of my pastors at church.. good night, many blessings…