Psalm 36:9
“For with you is the fountain of life; in your light we see light.”
Conversation
Daddy, I love you. You created me to be near to you and I absolutely love being near to you.
And I you, my daughter. Come, all is well with you.
Daddy, I don’t know what to say.
Come. Rest. Don’t strive. Caroline, have a word for you today. Come further in and don’t be afraid to show your weaknesses.
Daddy, I feel like all I’ve been doing is walking in my weaknesses as I follow you, for all the world to see. But I believe what you’re referring to is with prayer -praying for others and speaking.
Yes my daughter -you can do this with my help.
I will Dad. Thank-you for your encouragement and your leading -it won’t have been for nothing because I will do it.
I know you will my faithful one. Come, it’s time. I am well pleased with you.
Reflection:
Hello everyone… Today’s a bit of a catch-up day since I’ve not had time to write the last few days. On June 20th I dreamt that my daughter Bella and I were sitting outside on the ground relaxing, like how we’d sit on a blanket at the beach, though I didn’t see if we were sitting on anything. There were two high residential buildings near us; the building we lived in that we had walked out of to sit where we were on the ground was the further one. We had been sitting and laying down on the ground. Then I noticed it was getting dark and told Bella to get ready to go. Then I noticed she was taking a bit of time and I also noticed it was getting really dark -it was almost so dark that I couldn’t see very much. I felt an urgency to quickly go inside so I told her to hurry and I helped her up by taking her hand. Then we had our arms full of things; I saw a pillow and a winter blanket that we had used. She had the winter blanket in her arms so to help her I took the blanket and gave her the pillow. We had begun walking in the direction that would lead us around the building that we were closer to, but I changed my mind because it was the longer way around and we started walking back, which was straight towards our building, the way we had come. I’m not sure what this dream represents. I used to know what my dreams represent, if not right away the Lord would lead me to know sooner rather than later, but since a few years ago they changed slightly where I hardly ever know right away what they mean. Sometimes I do but others I need help with. I believe though that being on the ground means that I’m grounded in the Lord. I believe in this dream Bella represents my ‘learning’ about putting messages together. The pillow and winter blanket either mean that I had been resting, or sleeping or a difficult time will come (winter blanket and dark heavy clouds). But there’s an urgency and we needed to get up and go back inside. I think there’s an urgency to have my message prepared.
On June 21 I was walking down a wide staircase with Jesus my husband, side by side, and I laughed, “ha!” as I tilted my head up to laugh. He was walking on my left side. Then we were in the basement and I stepped out of something that reminds me of a giant pea-pod; it was all the way open and I stepped out of it and onto the floor. I knew that Jesus was in the basement somewhere but I didn’t know where. I also knew that at any moment he would come running to me because we were playing tag. I vaguely saw a corner on my right and then saw him running towards me from around the corner. He was quickly coming closer and I laughed with delight and said, “wait, wait!” I wasn’t ready to run yet because I couldn’t see very clearly; it was like I had just woken up and my eyes were still foggy from sleep. So I could only see him vaguely and wasn’t ready to run so I needed a bit of a moment. He hadn’t stopped when I said that but had continued to run all the way up to me.
Last night in my dream I was outside looking up into the sky. I saw that the sky was full of the darkest clouds I had ever seen; it looked like a storm/tornado would hit any moment. There were a few places where it wasn’t as thick and so through these places I saw the brightest and most intense sunshine I had ever seen; I could see the roundness of the sun, that ‘s how close the sun was. It reminds me of when I dreamt one time of Jesus my husband who had sunglasses on, but I could still see through part of his sunglasses and saw the intensity of his love as he gazed at me. Just like the sun, the intensity was so strong that I needed to look away… I would have looked back but I was aware of others, not sure what they would think. One day I know I’ll be free to enjoy Jesus my husband in front of others, and I can hardly wait for that day of freedom..
Yesterday morning at Shopgym we began our strength building program where we began with a smaller % of our PR’s or one-rep-max, and each week for the next six weeks (I think) we increase that percentage with the amount of reps. By the time we’re done the program we’ll have increased the amount of weight we can lift. So yesterday was our bench day, and then for our workout, in 8 minutes we rowed 1km and for the remainder of the time we did as many reps as possible of Squat Clean Thrusters; my weight was 65lbs. I really enjoy cleans and thrusters. Yesterday I was so disappointed when I felt obligated to give delicious potato wedges and chicken away:( I should have just taken them and ran away!! Im getting a haircut on July 4th! Changing the subject, I share this with you, in hopes that my transparency will help you in your walk with God. I think that when I’m able to get over this first stage of learning how to put messages together and the awkwardness of beginning to speak, if it’s in God’s plan for me, I’d love to be in a ministry with those who God will lead me to. I’m glad that I don’t know in full detail God’s plans for me because even though it’s so very difficult, I enjoy the anticipation of what will come next. The conversation with the Lord I posted today was yesterday’s conversation. I found that today has been a bit difficult and so my conversation this morning was really short. It was difficult just because of how long I need to wait for this particular pocket of time to be over. I know it’s the step before the next and I need to step on every one if I’m going to go up the ladder. I also know that I need this time to grow in what God is leading me into, so in order to be able to be ready for that, I need to take every step Jesus leads me in and grow in it as much as possible.. All right, I feel that all the words that were building up inside me have been written, so, many blessings to you -until next time.✌🏼