“And even the very hairs of your head are numbered. So don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows.” Matthew 10:30-31
Conversation
I love You Papa
I love you my darling. Rest, you are Mine. Come, prepare the way for the Lord. All is well with you.
Reflection
Hello and welcome to my journal. Life in the valley can be very difficult, but we need to remember that God is always faithful. Right now I’m in a valley, being tested and pruned so that in God’s time I’ll be ready to walk out of this valley, Victorious. What I’ve been doing as I’m waiting is spending time with God and keeping on doing what He’s already asked me to do. I’m clinging onto hope because God is my firm foundation. God is faithful and I know that He will never let me down, and I’m going to stay faithful to Him. He has shown me His faithfulness all the time and I know His love through that. God gives me dreams and wakes me up at certain times. As you read my journal my hope is that even though I’m in a valley in my life, I hope you will be inspired to always keep your heart open to God no matter what’s going on in your life, because God is a God of Love and He always has a Good plan for our life. He knows how to lead us; we just need to trust Him and follow Him! Very often God draws my heart to Him through songs and intimacy with Him in dreams, because as part of the bride of Christ, Jesus is my husband. My love for God/Jesus keeps on growing as I continue to pursue Him. During the night God wakes me up at certain times with either a word from Him and/or a dream. So here’s my journal entry for today.
11:36 (I think) I saw someone with a black shirt on (a vision)
12:21 “I’m dreaming of a white Christmas “
I dreamt that I was babysitting and I walked into the girls’ bedroom. Someone was talking loudly with a girl who went to her room. I told them to shh. I saw laying beside her was a baby. She glared at me and I asked her why she didn’t like me. Then the scene changed where I saw the mom was standing in another part of the house, maybe the kitchen. The girls had gone to another part of the house and in front of me was something like a small opening; I could have crawled through it to be where the girls were but I decided to walk around something to get to the area where they were.
12:29 “I start my mornings off with a cup of coffee.”
12:36. I saw bright stars shining in the dark sky.
44:7 I woke up and went downstairs to pray.
I had a dream where I said Happy Mothers Day, though in my dream I wasn’t sure if it was Mothers Day.
6:12 a vision of seeing two boys playing outside
Vision of someone being very still and the eye going over them without seeing them.
6:34 red cinnamon hearts were in a bowl and a women/girl wanting some.
7:09 “…beautiful I don’t deserve this, darling you look perfect tonight”
7:11 vision of three young people (two girls and one guy) one of the girls had beautiful blondish long hair. They were outside enjoying each others company.
7:23 “I have faith in what I see”
7:25 “you heard it, darling you look perfect tonight.”
7:34 “Casa Branca”
Blessings…❤️🔥
April 10: 1:04 “You catch me when I fall.”
4:18 “I have faith in what I see” (I went downstairs to pray)
6:34 “Three week parameter “ I told my brother in a dream (or it could have been Lucas) that we couldn’t afford to fall. He was leaning me over a short wall on a bridge, almost making me fall. Jeanette was standing nearby watching.
I had a dream where two men were trying to take a boy and put him in their wagon but I got upset at them and managed to get him off of the wagon. I had seen his skinny legs from underneath something.
I also dreamt that I was taking a photo of Bella in front of her school. I was leading her to a good spot and was going to take a photo when I noticed there were curtains that were blocking my view. I saw an opening in the curtains where I could see her school so I began walking in that direction to take a better photo. As I was walking there I saw a homeless man sitting with his head back, sleeping.
8:23 “Are you ready to do that daily?” And in my dream I said no, though when I was awake I had a feeling like I should have said yes.
I had a dream where there was a plan to drive a vehicle into a river with the windows open. I imagined myself pushing myself off of the vehicle as it splashed into the water.
I had a dream where I wanted to jump off of someone’s balcony with a vehicle, like a quad, but I didn’t know how to get the vehicle onto the balcony through the apartment. Then someone was helping me and had gotten it all ready by putting all the pieces together (like LEGO), and I was bringing the pieces to the balcony where I would put it together. There was a scene where this person had put all the small pieces in a plastic basket. I needed a basket and thought to dump what was in the basket so I could use it, but then I didn’t, thinking about all the work that was put into it. The basket was on a pile of things that needed to be put together on the balcony, vaguely seeing a wheel or a fan.
I had a small child on my lap, smelling like she had gone poop in her diaper. We were sitting at a table, waiting for someone to come. Then one of my pastors came and I was quietly encouraging her to talk. I noticed her nails and saw how nice they were. This is when I heard right before waking up, “Are you ready to do that daily?” In my dream as I was waking up I said no, but when I woke up I wished I had said yes.
In another dream I saw Jesus diving from something onto the sand on a beach. I also kind of saw that he could have landed on his feet but ended in a diving position on the sand, and I imagined it hurting. I sensed he wanted me to follow.
9:58 “Make a review about cakes” seeing vaguely an open date, seeing the seed close to my face. I have dates in the fridge. I love dates and I eat one or two everyday. I’ve been thinking to make date squares.
12:37 “Have you ever hung on that cross/tree.” (I heard in my heart laying in bed thinking about my dreams and kind of sleeping.)
Internally I have a quiet trust; I know that God has his hand on me, sees me all the time, knows the difficulty. He knows what my hearts desire is and how persistent I am with dying to myself with every act of faith, not always fully knowing if what I’m doing is what God is asking me to do. I will never give up… 🫰🏼Goodnight…
April 11: 11:38 “Got a weakness in your kidney”
4:41 (didn’t look at the time right away) I heard something about watching something for the second time is key.
7:07 I saw Lucas’ sleeping bag on the floor but it was in pieces, ripped in half. I saw a portion of it laid out like it had been wet and was drying. There were couches kind of around it though I had a feeling like it was in our kitchen.
I was in the kitchen with Connie and my mom. We all had slippers on, the kind that would soak in water (like the knitted kind). I had dumped water on the floor and now there was a lot of water on the floor but they didn’t notice. There was some kind of sponge like carpet on the floor so that when we stepped on it, our slippers soaked in the water.
I was going to get chips and was walking towards getting it from the shelf when Bella walked in front of me and got it before me. She opened the bag and I put my hand in and got a handful of chips before she could (the bag was nearly empty). I saw among the chips in my hand there was a green (I saw the colour green) leaf that reminds me of a Bay leaf, but it was a Dill leaf (dill looks different in waking life).
Then I was walking trying not to drop anyone the floor when Bella held out her hand behind her with some more chips for me to take. So I took them, which almost made me drop some of the chips.
In this dream I was going to a meeting. There was a little boy standing close to me. I asked an adult something about why there was a meeting and they said because the little boy only talks with girls. The little boy looked up at me innocently and I said to him something like that should be okay that he only talks with girls. There was going to be a selected small group of people who would sit around a table to talk about it. We were all bringing something to the table to talk about, to contribute, and I was thinking about what I would bring. I was bringing light blue nail polish. When the meeting was over I saw that there wasn’t a lid for it. Then the meeting was done (in my dream I didn’t see the meeting) and behind the curtain there was a long table or something that had the things people had brought (or something), and I looked on the left side to look for my nail polish and it wasn’t there so I went to the right side and saw my blue nail polish that had the lid on, so I took it. I thought to myself that the next day I would sit on the couch while watching tv, putting my nail polish on. I’m going to put my top coat on my nails as I watch Crash Landing On You…
I also dreamt that I was driving a big car and I wanted to park close to a door. I thought the door would be big enough to drive through but it was only a small door so I parked alongside a wall where the door was in front of me. It wasn’t really a parking spot but because it was difficult to move I just left it there. I think I dreamt this before the dream about the meeting.
I had a wonderful time with my sister Connie!! I ordered a Caramel Macchiato and a Date square, and my sister shared her chicken sandwich with me and also her cream cheese brownie (I shared my date square with her). It was a good day…. Blessings…🫰🏼
April 12: 12:37 I had a vision of a woman wearing a summer dress. The dress was open in the back (and had a low neckline) with straps. It seemed like the camera was moving from seeing her back to seeing her side.
4:22 I woke up and went downstairs to pray. Earlier in the night I heard in my heart right before waking up something like “taking my own medication.” I’m not on any medication; I’m taking fish oil, vitamin D and Magnesium.
6:40 I had a vision of a woman wearing a black and white skirt pushing a full cart of food, about to walk through an automatic door, out of a grocery store.
6:46 A vision of someone in a lab taking a photo of someone’s brain and talking about this persons brain in a negative way.
6:55 A vision of someone laying down kind of in a c position and hearing, “I am the missing piece.”
7:00 “Positioning me”
7:02 “You are my all in all”
7:04 A vision, seeing cars going onto someone’s driveway.
7:24 “Oh I am free, I am free indeed”(song)
7:17 Natural
7:18 “Mom, let’s go pee”
7.34 “All in all”
7:39 “Oh to give up I’d be a fool.” I dreamt I was standing in the small (I think) Kids Rock hallway, talking (standing) with two people after the service. I was facing the foyer and saw people standing in the foyer. Then the lady stepped to the side, like she was opening the way for me to walk. Then I noticed people were standing in the foyer (sensing it was late and a lot of people had left already), when all of a sudden I remembered that I was volunteering at the world Cafe. I’m volunteering at the World Cafe tomorrow.
9:35 “I’m running back to You…”
Yesterday I went for a walk to the park (to the covered area by the lagoon) and jogged all the way back home. When I got back I took Coco for a walk. I know Im following God, Jesus and I know that I always will…. Yesterday I watched Crash Landing On You, episodes 9 and 10. The scene where she holds her hands behind her back and drops her gift (the watch) reminds me of my dream two nights ago where Bella had her hands behind her back and was giving me chips.