Psalm 90: 1,2
“Lord, you have been our dwelling place, throughout all generations. Before the mountains were born or you brought forth and the world, from everlasting to everlasting, you are God.”
My Father. Thank-you for what you are doing in my life. Thank-you for your goodness and for your mercy. Thank-you for your faithfulness and for your deep love. Show me Father if there’s something I’m not seeing. Give me eyes to see where I’m blind. I just have a sense that I’m still not believing something. Show me Father -open my eyes so I truly see.
“Love”
Father, deep inside I know that I have a wondering how Jesus as my husband could desire and love me. Not that I’m unlovable but that I’m too old to accomplish something great for him. I have a, “he’s disappointed” feeling inside. This is something I need to be lifted out of.
Come my darling, rest, you are Mine. I am faithful. Caroline, there’s more; dig deeper into me. (After praying more in my prayer language, I sensed the Lord saying, “come up higher my daughter. Trust me and you will see.”)
Okay Father, I’m ready but you need to help me come up higher.
I love you Caroline; you are well on your way.
Reflection:
Happy Thursday!! Yesterday I went to my usual 5 AM gym class, and we did a 30 rounds workout of: max row calories, 45sec, the rest 15 sec; max rep walking lunges, 45 sec -rest 15 sec; max rep devil press, 45 sec, rest 15 sec; max rep butterfly sit-ups, 45 sec, rest 15sec; max rep alternating box step-ups, 45sec, rest 15 sec. -a good workout. They always bug me now about using a mat for my sit-ups… I had said a few weeks ago that we used to always use mats for these workouts and now the gym only has three mats! So yesterday someone said, “Where’s Caroline’s mat… she’s going to need a mat! I just laughed and said something like, “yep, I love my mat!! I really do think that mats make it a lot easier and don’t know what I’d do without one!
Yesterday I went to my Optometrist appointment and I’m getting new glasses, yay I’m so excited to be able to see better! They’ll be here in about two weeks! Yesterday I went to Polo Park and the lyrics that welcomed me in were, “I’d climb every mountain, swim every ocean…” Absolutely love that song! The other night I had dreamt that there was a group of people who didn’t believe me when I told them something about God; my husband doesn’t believe me that God is leading me into becoming a pastor but this part of my dream could also represent that I’m not fully believing it either. I do believe it, but in the deepest part of who I am, am I believing it there? Because if I don’t believe it there then how can I move forward except that God will need to do his work in me and bring me forward. I want to become a pastor.. I just need to begin my studies. Anyway, I’m really craving coffee!! Which is why I don’t drink it at home because I know I’ll get addicted to caffeine again. Also, I jumped on a trampoline yesterday and had a blast! I used to do flips and things but I don’t have the mobility like I used to have. I used to babysit and they had a trampoline, but I always wished I had one. They had one of those green ones that bounced really high, so it was a lot easier to do flips on those I think. I had also dreamt that I had sat down and could see the TV screen from where I was sitting, thinking it represents that I need to watch another sermon.. I’m praying the Lord will cause me to hear what he wants me to hear that will help my walk with him. Have a wonderful rest of the week -blessings!