Proverbs 8:32
“Now then, my sons, listen to me; blessed are those who keep my ways.”
Conversation
Daddy, my mind has been running so fast this morning. I want to be caught by you, so help me take another step with you.
Abide in me My darling, and I will abide in you.
Thank-you Daddy, I know you’ll be with me as I follow your lead. Daddy, I’m feeling so overwhelmed by all that’s going on. I feel like I’m juggling many different things. Help me to keep calm and focus on You because I know that that’s the only way I’ll make it through.
My daughter come, rest. I love you. You are not alone.
Thank-you Lord, I know this. It’s just easy to forget when I don’t keep it at the forefront of my mind. I’m really missing where you’re leading me.. Help me not to keep thinking about everything I’m juggling; help me to only focus on you and be filled by you because everything else will fall into place exactly how you want them to be.
Remember Caroline to be at rest.
Okay Lord, thank-you. I love you so much..
Reflection
What makes me really really sad is that most of the time I’m not able to follow Jesus as quickly as he wants me to.. I feel deep empathy for him; I think I’ve disappointed him so very many times and I feel so sorry about that. A big part of this that makes it a journey is that I hold back so many times because I don’t have the courage. I’m finding that having courage and the Holy Spirit who enables me, go hand in hand. I’ve found that when I don’t have courage, I’m also too empty inside to do what’s been asked, so when I do have the courage to step out in my faith, it’s because God has enabled me to do it because he’s filled me enough to be able to do it. I see this now more clearly than I did before.. Changing the subject, I’ve been sitting at my desk so much lately that I’m not physically prepared to go to the beach!! I finally sun-tanned a bit early this afternoon; I’m just glad that what matters most is my heart!! As I was talking with my friends yesterday, it reminded me about the dream I had a few nights ago about sitting close to Jesus.. Close friends are a gift from God:)
I woke up this morning at 5:54 with the lyrics, “Your love runs wild for me, wild for me your love runs wild for me..” I believe it! I dreamt last night that I was standing in front of someone who was going to give a ride to a newborn baby that someone had placed in a two-seater ride that was going to go up. The person who was giving the ride was talking with the person who had put their baby there, so because they were talking, I crouched down a little and quickly walked to the baby to put my hand out so the baby wouldn’t fall. Then when I got closer I saw that instead of the baby sitting there, there was a pretzel dessert that was made with straight pretzels. In the bunched up pretzel dessert I saw three straight pretzels standing up beside and touching each-other against the backrest, and a pretzel in the front, kind of laying down a bit. I saw that the dessert was held together with crunchy peanut butter; I saw the colour was brown like peanut butter, and I saw lots of bits of peanuts in the peanut butter. Then I saw the back three pretzels settle further into the chair and then I knew that the dessert was safe and wouldn’t fall off on the ride. As the dream ended I was turning around to go back to where I had been standing before. I have an idea about what it could mean, but not totally sure.
I dreamt this dream in the summer sometime I think, but I took it down, thinking it’s too revealing. But because the Lord gave it to me, there’s a reason he did and I need to be obedient to him. So I’m reposting it; I had dreamt that I was laying in our bed underneath the blanket, inviting my husband to come join me. He was standing in the corner of our room (not actual) in the open doorway looking at me. Then he said something like, “no thank you,” and walked out of the room.
Changing the subject, I think part of how the Lord is waking me up to knowing his love is beginning to allow myself to enjoy certain types of food/desserts again. I normally don’t buy myself something to eat when my kids and I are out because I feel that the money we have as a family isn’t mine, so I wait until we get home to eat. But I also don’t like to eat too much fast food, so that’s another reason why I wait to eat at home. I do allow myself more than I used too at home, and I’m also allowing myself to enjoy other things like listening to the radio (at first it was country music, then soft music like 99.1 or 99.7, I’m not sure now exactly which station it was. But last Monday we were enjoying classical/Jazz), also being open to learning how to play the piano again. I used to play the organ a lot, but I’ve never learned how to play by notes beyond the really beginner books, it was more by ear. Changing the subject, the battery on the truck died because my husband had left the hazard lights on too long that day, and now the alternator needs to be replaced as well. My kids and I drove it to church for Youth but we barley made it before the new battery that was put into it, drained completely. I was so relieved we made it!! But I needed to drive through the last light which happened to be red because the truck would hardly begin driving again after having stopped before, so I didn’t want to be stuck on the highway. I’m so glad we were on a turning lane and that there weren’t very many cars around! This Saturday we’re going to an older couples house for supper. Okay all ya’ll, many blessings to you…☕️