Proverbs 17:3 (AMP)
“The refining pot is for silver and the furnace for gold, but the Lord tries the hearts.”
Conversation
Papa, I worship You. I praise Your Mighty Name! I love You. You have been so good to me. I am Your servant and I’m so honoured that You have chosen me and are using me for Your good purpose.
I love you My darling. My faithful one. You are Mine. Come, I have more for you. Draw near and hear.
Papa, thy Word is a lamp unto my feet and a light unto my path. Great is Your faithfulness to me. My heart is Yours. I’m not going to miss what You have for me!
Come My faithful daughter, rise up; you will do what I’ve asked you to do, and it takes great courage to do what you are doing. Come and you will find rest for your soul. Take heart, for I have overcome the world! Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. You are Mine.
Papa, others have laid down their life for me; what greater love is there? (besides what You did on the cross for me and for everyone in the world) I know that I’ve also laid down my own life for you Jesus, Papa, and I will continue to do that as I’m obeying Your personal word to me. I’m doing this because I love You and I want Your first choice of plans for me. I want to be all You’ve created me to be, and I know I can do so much more than I’ve already done. I want to show You Papa what I can do in Your strength as You lead me! Watch me! Papa the verse, “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me” comes to mind. Thank you for Your love and for Your guidance.
I love you My sweet Caroline. I will watch you; you are Mine!
Reflection
Hello everyone, welcome to today’s page in my journal! The Lord wakes me up most nights at certain times after He’s given me a dream, which I sometimes don’t know the meaning of but other times I do, and it’s such a great comfort to my heart. I absolutely love sharing what God is doing in my heart, hoping it’ll inspire you to spend time with God everyday and grow the most fulfilling relationship with Him!
Someone had preached in a building and I was in another building close by, walking behind a lady. The building we were walking in was all open in the inside. There was another part of the building (on my left side; left wing) that I felt was as big as where we were walking that was joined together with the building where we were walking. Where it was joined it was all open; I only saw this out of the corner of my eye because I had my eyes on the lady who was walking in front of me. She had a fitted skirt suit on that came up to just above her knees and had some papers in her hands. As she was walking she was almost stomping, making her footsteps loud (I vaguely saw a few papers she had in her arms gently float to the floor). The feeling I had was that there was someone in the connecting room that she was trying to steer, like in the movie Narnia: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe” where the children were led into the room with the wardrobe by “footsteps” they were hearing). Then I was in the building that someone had preached in earlier (where the woman had been steering me into by stomping her feet as she walked), and someone was with me, following me as I walked. I think it could have been the same person who I had been following in the other building. As I was walking in this building I was overwhelmed with the presence of God and began sobbing and said, “I love God so much when I’m in these buildings!” (the buildings where God is preached)
Then I dreamt that there was clear deep water in a building, like it was a pool, and I don’t know how long this pool was because I only saw one end of it. I knew and vaguely saw a large open glass jar (much bigger than a person) standing upright inside this pool (standing on the floor of the pool), and the water was higher than the opening of the jar. Someone had fallen into the jar (I vaguely saw her standing on the floor of the jar), and there was someone sitting calmly (could have been leaning forward with their elbows on their legs) beside the water like parents do when they sit beside the pool when their children are taking swimming lessons. I thought to myself that we need to tip over the jar so that she could come out because I had the feeling like she couldn’t breathe. Yes! I’ve been caught! I’m in over my head in the deep waters of the Holy Spirit! I’ve been caught with transparency! Right now I’m still nervous but I know the Holy Spirit is going to calm me down. Then I had awoken but fell asleep, and when I awoke again just after seven, I had heard these words in my heart, “The door is going to close.” I’m determined to run through the door as quickly as I can so it won’t close on me! I’m going to put all the pieces of my message together today so that I’m ready to record tomorrow..
Yesterday we brought our very good friend to the airport; I’m so thankful for her and will miss her very much. During the last week I saw a few different license plates that said a few different things that have meaning to me, and I’m just encouraged when I see God’s creativity. My back is doing so much better than before.. I went to the chiropractor on Thursday but it wasn’t urgent, and it had been 6 weeks since I was there last. My upper back is still feeling really good!
In the dream I got last night about the jar being fully submerged in deep water, I was feeling like we needed to tip the jar over so the girl could get out to be able to breathe; today after the service at church I received speaking tips when I went for prayer, which I thought were so helpful! I know that I’m actually going to do it this time!
Last night we watched Spider-Man: No Way Home: The part where one of the three says something about the other looking like a cool youth pastor, and he was wearing a green shirt! How fun is that! About a week or two ago I had a word in my heart before waking up about “getting green,” so I’m changing my perspective from being afraid of stepping up/speaking and becoming a youth pastor to pursuing it and running after it! God has called me to that so I won’t allow the enemy to steal it from me! On the table at church were books that people could take, so I took The Amplified Bible and Sharing Your Faith by Bruce Bickel and Stan Jantz. I thought it was so neat that the only page that’s ripped off in the Bible (it’s still tucked in the Bible), is page number 717, which has part of Proverbs chapters 16 and 18, and the whole chapter of 17! I see God’s hand so much in my life to encourage me on our walk together; it amazes me how close He really is to me. About my new Bible, as I was writing the Bible verse above it dawned on me about AMP:) I’m planning to go to Shopgym tomorrow. Bella suggested watching The Lion, Witch and Wardrobe, and I’m thinking that maybe I need to see something there. Because I’m going to record my message tomorrow, I’m not going to go to my friends place to finish talking about sharing our testimony, and will need to do that the following week. Many blessings… 🔥
November 27: Today I was working at finishing my message and I was hoping to record as well, but I’ll need to record tomorrow. Even though I wont be home by myself, I’m still planning on recording; planning to record in Bella’s room where it’s more private. I didn’t go to shopgym this morning and wont be going until either Friday or next Monday. I just need to focus on my recording and presenting because in my dream the other day the door was going to close soon, and I don’t want to miss God’s first plan for my life. I spent over an hour transferring almost all my photos and videos to my iPad, so tomorrow I won’t need to think about that. After church yesterday we went to Ikea where I had salmon. I actually really enjoy salmon. We don’t eat fish at home very often. Today for supper my kiddos and I are going to have wraps (rice, black beans and other stuff). I’m disappointed that I didn’t record today because I was very determined to do it. Two nights ago I had dreamt that I saw a few white papers gently fall to the floor, and I was hoping it wouldn’t mean that I wouldn’t be recording. I really tried to do it today. But I believe I’m in a season right now where God is testing me, so I really want to do well. So however it turns out, I just want to have done it and tried my best. So, it’s like I’ve fallen down a hill but I’m getting back up!! I’m feeling great and optimistic and I know that the Holy Spirit will lead me tomorrow! I love my bait!!! I’m still hoping to present it this week, feeling an urgency. I really need to get it done.. blessings…
November 28: I’m going to record today but thought I’d quickly post my dreams and thoughts about them. In my dream I was in church, sitting in a service. The service was almost done when my Pastor began walking among the congregation. He stopped by a guy and asked him to walk around and touch or put his hand on the people who he saw the Holy Spirit moving. I didn’t hear him ask this, but it was a knowing or a sense I had. So the guy got up and walked over to a person a bit behind from where he was sitting and touched the person. Then he was looking around and began walking in my direction (I was facing him, and it felt like I was facing my backrest) and stopped when he was closer to me, as if pondering. I had my head resting on the side like I would when I’m resting my head on my pillow, and then I turned my head so that my forehead rested down, like I was resting on the backrest (I believe my back is at rest). Then he walked the rest of the way to me and put his hand on me. I’m thinking this represents that I’ve been in service, laying my life down completely for God/Jesus, because I love them (the words don’t show emotion, but I needed to stop myself from crying as I was writing it). It was 19 years ago when I needed to decide if I wanted God’s first choice/plan for me. I knew that I could fully trust in God for my life, so that’s what I did; I abandoned myself into God’s care because I knew that God’s way is always the best way, even though I couldn’t see it.
Then the scene changed where I was in the bathroom (sorry, more toilet humour). I had a white bar of soap in my hands that slipped out of my hands and landed on a dirty part of the floor close to a wall (there was a puddle of really bright coloured liquid (red or pink) on the floor that the bar of soap skidded through.) I knew I’d need to clean the bar of soap when I picked it up again, and I rushed to a bathroom stall. When I was in the stall I was wiping my underwear with toilet paper and I saw that the poop was white. I’m thinking that white poop represents being pure or honest as I’ve been sharing.
Then I noticed that I was wearing my long light green pyjama shirt, and I heard someone with kids coming into the bathroom so I was quickly going to change. In my dream I needed to go into another stall to change or something, but this part is vague. Then I noticed that the service was over and people had begun walking away. I vaguely pictured myself standing at the end when people are asked to invite Jesus into their heart, and this had already taken place. Then I was standing in front of a lady who was leaning up against a wall I think. Her skin was a bit darker and she had a really small head. I had her daughter in my arms who was talking to her. As she was talking, and even though she was about 4 or 5 years old (blonde hair), I noticed that her head, which was normal size, was a lot bigger than her moms. It did not look like they were related. I’m thinking that the long pyjama shirt represents that I haven’t been completely alert and that I’m in a transition where I will be completely alert (changing out of my pj’s) because of the Holy Spirit! That’s it for now. We’re planning on going to church tonight.. many blessings…