But You, O Lord, are a compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness.” Psalm 86:15
Conversation
Papa, I love You. Thank-You for Your love and for Your never ending pursuit of me.
Come closer My faithful one. You are Mine.
Papa, tonight as I was praying with Bella, I felt something new in my heart. Something I’ve always known in my mind and didn’t know that I didn’t know in my heart; it’s our great need of You. I’ve never felt this in my heart like how I’m feeling it right now. I’ve felt this for myself when I’ve been so discouraged, but I’ve never felt it for other people, not like this. Thank-You Papa. I ask that You would deepen this feeling in my heart for other people.
I love you My daughter. Come even closer.
Okay Papa. Draw me closer to Your heart as I spend more time with You. Enable me because on my own I can’t.
Come My faithful one, I will enable you.
Caroline My daughter, rise up.
Okay Papa, help me get ready for when it’s time. Cause the fire in my heart to grow for You!
I love you My daughter.
I love You Papa.
Reflection
Hello and welcome to today’s page in my journal! The Lord wakes me up most nights at certain times after He’s given me a dream, which I sometimes don’t know the meaning of but other times I do, and it’s such a great comfort to my heart. I absolutely love sharing what God is doing in my heart, hoping it’ll inspire you to spend time with God everyday and grow the most fulfilling relationship with Him. For the past while God has been taking me through a spiritual shower. I believe He’s preparing me for what’s coming up next. He’s purifying my heart so that my heart is clean before Him. It also clears the way for me to hear Holy Spirit better when there’s no mess in the way. I record the times when God says something to me because even in that, there’s meaning. Blessings.
February 20: 12:15 (I think) I was with my mentor in what felt like a van. We were talking together in the back part of the van, and she was giving me instructions. I had a feeling like she was giving other people instructions too, but one person at a time.
I was running on the top of a really high building; some kind of monster was running after me. I had a vague feeling like I had no choice but to jump off the building. Near the bottom I imagined spreading my arms, flying, and landing softly. I don’t remember landing but then I was running through snow drifts very quickly, running from the monster and not knowing if it had also jumped. I came to some kind of alley entrance and was uncertain about the safety of it, then began walking forward into it.
I’m not sure but this building could represent me not having a feeling inside my heart about our great need of God, and how without Him, we, as one group of people in the world, really are lost. I keep getting amazed at how the things I know, I didn’t truly know! I’m coming to a realization that when we only have knowledge about God in our minds, it’s not really knowing it. From my experience it’s only when this knowledge gets to my heart is when I actually know it and believe it. God is still waking me up, and I don’t want this to stop! It makes me think, how else am I still spiritually asleep? I was in the city all day today; Bella’s band was at the convention centre until noon, and then we went to Polo Park for the afternoon. Normally she feels rushed so today I thought I’d go where she wanted for how long she wanted. I normally don’t enjoy walking around in malls for too long, so it was difficult for me not to rush her. I really had a very good time hanging out with her! Goodnight -blessings…
February 21: I went to Shopgym and when I got back I was so tired that I didn’t have the energy to get ready to go out right away again.. I also keep remembering the dream that I wished I could tell the person (who represents me) to get ready for something. I believe that I need to get my real testimony ready, and I’m going to begin this morning before going to voice (after a nap). Thank you Jesus, feeling blessed!! 🤩
I woke up at 4:04 last night, and I vaguely had a dream where I had chosen a brown bottle or brown something. I actually woke up one time before that and had had the same dream. I was so tired and tried really hard to remember my dream as soon as I woke up, but when I tried remembering one thing correctly, I forgot the other thing in my dream. The second time the one thing I remembered was that I had chosen the brown bottle or whatever it was. I had gone to bed at 1:30 because of my writing. I just hadn’t had the time to sit and spend time with God the last few days so I needed that time with Him. I finished the whole workout this morning! I did my last burpee right when the time was done. There’s a song that I really like by Anne Wilson called Strong. I remember growing up that my mom always told me I was strong, and I always believed her! Many blessings to you… Tonight my kiddos and I are at church; Lucas is doing tech for the family event, and I’ll join zoom for the Sanctuary course. I got a haircut this afternoon.. shorter than all the others. It’ll be easy to take care of! I’ll post later today. My kiddos don’t have school tomorrow. Blessings..