This Is My Wife!!!!

“Let everything that has breath praise the Lord. Praise the Lord!” -Psalm 150:6

Conversation

Papa, I love You so deeply. Thank-You for being so near to me. I am Your and You are mine.

I love you Caroline My daughter. Come, I have a word for you today -you are Mine.

Papa, You are so Great! Thank-You for Your great mercy for my life. I am so honoured to be called Your daughter and to be one of Your representatives. You are Holy and I worship You and give You all the honour and praise! I pray Papa that You would fill me with Your love; I want to love other better. 

Come My daughter and rest.

Papa, I feel like even if I try and finish what You’ve asked me to do, I don’t think I’ll finish it before You come or before You say it’s time. I’m not complaining but I also need to keep reading my two books and finish my painting. Help me have a good balance with doing what You’ve asked me to do. 

I will surely help you My love.

Thank-You for Your assurance Papa. I feel more peace in my heart again.

I love you Caroline. All is well with you.

Reflection

Hello and welcome to today’s page in my journal! The Lord wakes me up most nights at certain times after He’s given me a dream, which I sometimes don’t know the meaning of but other times I do, and it’s such a great comfort to my heart. I absolutely love sharing what God is doing in my heart, hoping it’ll inspire you to spend time with God everyday and grow the most fulfilling relationship with Him. For the past while God has been taking me through a spiritual shower. I believe He’s preparing me for what’s coming up next. He’s purifying my heart so that my heart is clean before Him. It also clears the way for me to hear Holy Spirit better when there’s no mess in the way. I record the times when God says something to me because even in that, there’s meaning. Blessings. 

March 4: 11:13 “Watch your heart!” 

I dreamt that I was walking up a few steps with a close friendship group of about five. I was walking in front of them and they were walking so close to me that we were almost touching. I had a bathing suit on that had a short skirt and a bikini top. I didn’t have anything on underneath the bathing suit skirt so I was being very careful how I walked up the stairs so that my skirt would stay down, and sometimes the right side of my bikini top would go down and fully expose me, so I’d quickly pulled up my bathing suit to cover myself again. I had a feeling like both these happened before, but I’m not sure about that. It was familiar anyways. 

In this dream Lucas and I were walking around a corner (going left) in town (from 1st street going onto 3rd Ave.) We were on the left side of the road as we were making the turn, and I saw a school bus was about to turn onto the same road we were going onto. The bus was making a right turn. It was coming from the opposite way (we would have crossed paths if we weren’t turning. We both noticed the bus come behind us so we quickly ran down the road on the right side about one yard’s length to run onto a driveway to go onto the sidewalk. I went onto the sidewalk but I noticed that Lucas had made a quick decision to try and beat the bus; He quickly started to go back onto the road so I called out to him, something to get him to come back onto the sidewalk because the bus was coming too fast for him to beat the bus, so he started coming back onto the sidewalk when the dream ended. I had a feeling like we were walking home and he wanted to beat the bus home. 

I dreamt something about some dogs, that they were being friendly to me, I don’t fully remember.

1:57, 3:07 “Oh the overwhelming, never ending , wrecklace love of God. I couldn’t earn it. I don’t deserve it, still You give your life away. There’s no shadow you won’t light up, mountain you won’t climb up, coming after me.. 

4:07 In this dream I watched a light move from the right side of a live map laying in front of me, to the left side. As I watched the dim light move across it, it seemed like it was going and going and never stopping; it was going slow (not very slow) and steady. I couldn’t see beyond where it was. Then I saw sand and water appear on the left, water lapping onto the sand; I saw it had reached the coast!, and I knew it had reached the end! And I was so excited that it had reached the end! It reminds me of the song about going from shore to shore!

In this dream Bella was 15 years old and we were in another persons place who had a daughter who was also 15 years old. I saw both of them together, beside each other in the kitchen, kind of sitting on the counter, lifting their legs a bit. I noticed how both of them had longer legs and looked grown up. I had been in their bathroom. Then her mom was in a hurry and began rushing her daughter because they needed to go somewhere. Then they left and as I walked through the living room I saw it vaguely. I had a feeling like the girl had a brother or two, and that they were African American. The lights were off and I vaguely saw their couches and other living room furniture. I was walking around a corner, walking to the right and I got to the bathroom where I had been in earlier. I saw that the bathroom had been filled with steam like a sauna. Then I saw a small radio type thing that I had used/had had my hand on, and on it was a switch with a white dot on it, or something white was on it that I had accidentally pressed while my hand was on it, which made the room fill with steam. 

I was walking across a busy street. There was a big semi truck/trailer that was stopped at a red light (I didn’t see the red light, I just knew.) and even though I could have gone underneath the trailer to go to the other side safely, I didn’t, instead I did what was right (I imagined the driver of the semi truck watching me and being glad that I didn’t go underneath.) and went behind it to go to the other side. When I got to the other side I saw colours in front of me like in a painting (green and blue) and I went into it/melted into it. I found myself in a beautiful path (I don’t think this was a ditch) that was made by people having walked there a lot. It had very green grass and green shrub branches on both sides. It was light and peaceful. I saw vaguely beyond the greenery that I was in a residential area and then I heard someone hammering, like they were working on a project at their home, building something. I saw that the path went downward slightly then up again like I was on a hill. I wanted to lay down and rest there but then I began to be afraid for my safety, that someone would come so I quickly began running out. (It’s like my heart has a mind of its own..I don’t know what I’m afraid of. I know I don’t need to be afraid of my hubby.)

6:19, I heard in my heart someone say, “It’s time to go!” I dreamt I was in a house and Lucas was with me. There was a dad there with his baby. I think there was another child or two there. The baby was in something like a bouncer and then I saw the dad sit beside the baby (with his back facing me so I was behind him) on a comfy couch-chair and put his arm around the baby, snuggling close. I was in a chair or something and had caused the chair to push the dad and his baby to a wall, but I saw that he was protecting the baby with his arms. I told him that I was glad he was doing that. Then we had gotten up and he had walked somewhere in a room that was attached to the room we were in, maybe bringing the baby away, and I saw that there were three area rugs on the floor that were pushed to the side so I went and straightened them out. Two of them were kind of on top of one another. As I was doing that the dad came back in. Then it had been a bit quiet and then he asked me something about education. He had been homeschooling and had two or three white dividers between him and his wife’s bed and the rest of the room where we were. He was asking something about when they wouldn’t homeschool anymore, what to do with the dividers (I had the feeling like he wanted to take them down), and I said he could still leave them there (thinking he wanted privacy with his wife). Then there was some kind of bell that rang and I looked and saw that there was a railing beside me, and beyond the railing was a medal bar; on the bar was a thick chain with a bell at the end that had rang. The bell didn’t look like a typical bell, it was just inside the end of the chain (it was inside a small compartment). Then someone broke it off and it fell. I watched it as it was falling through the air. Then I noticed as I looked down that there was very deep water there, and the chain fell into the water and I watched it sink deeper and deeper in and settle at the bottom of the water. I imagined sea animals getting hit and trapped by it. Then I saw many other things on the sea floor, or at the bottom of the water. Over time people had dropped things in. I could see that the water was very very deep and clear. Then as I kept looking into the water I began seeing a room, like the room was filled with water and we were on the level higher. I saw a bed I think (vague) but then I saw a toilet clearly, and knew that was the bathroom. I saw that that level was filled with water to the brim. Then I began to be afraid, feeling like the house was unstable, so I pulled myself to the more middle part of the house to get out of the room (where I had seen the deep water underneath). Then I realized that the floor I was on was the top floor (could have also had an attic with stairs). The house I was in was like one of those old big houses that had two upstairs levels. I had a sense that the room I saw that was filled to the top with water was the master bedroom and the man’s room with the baby was on the floor above that. So I began feeling unstable in this house. Earlier, I noticed in my right pocket a peanut toy and thought to let the baby play with it. Then I noticed they already had that toy so I put mine back, not wanting our toys to get mixed up. I also had a knowing that the man’s wife was out with their two big dogs. I believe some kind of chains are gone and a bell has rung to make it known?! I’m on a higher level? The level underneath is filled with the Holy Spirit? 

6:19 “Time to go!” 

I was outside in a pool but managed to drag myself out with my arms and getting my legs up.  I think someone wanted to push me back in but this part is vague. I heard someone say something about the Dune movie, like something represented the Dune movie. In waking life we’ve watched the movie a few times (Lucas and his dad are more excited about it than Bella and myself), and we’re planning on watching the new Dune movie in the theatre when it comes out. I think we’re actually going tomorrow at 10:10 PM in the Landmark Cinema.

6:31 I heard in my heart, my hubby say, “This is my wife!” Right before waking up. I sensed he had a magazine that he was going to show.  “This is my wife!” going up one note at a time with each word, saying it like it was the last sentence he was going to say about his story, the conclusion of his story. Yes!!! Jesus is drawing me closer to his heart -bride of Christ! 

I ate two half subs, Turkey and Tuna and had all the condiments. My pie was#76, and my husband bought a Mocha cake #157. I notice things sometimes that remind me of my dreams. Yesterday as I was standing, watching the sanctuary on the screen I noticed someone videoing in front of me, reminding me of my dream that my niece had turned around to look at me after I said to her something about leaving without telling me. Also the intercom from the office during practice. Also hearing that someone was going to fall down the stairs; I dreamt that I had fallen on my face, thinking I had fallen in my heart because of who I saw together. Looking forward to Wednesday!! I have more to talk about, more luggage that I saw in my dream the other night, but I’ll need to leave it for next time. School was cancelled today so if I don’t get a call tomorrow, then I’ll be going to visit my mom. I haven’t seen her in a few weeks. I didn’t go to shopgym this morning; I was up so much, writing my dreams. I sensed it was fine that I didn’t go and I still have peace about it. I’m sensing my hubby needs to catch me, and I want to be caught!!! In this photo with red hair I was 27 years old. I was working at Upstairs for Hair and I had done her hair for her graduation. I was about 15/16 years old in the one with purple capri. I was with my family somewhere close to Seven Sisters Falls. This is my 573rd post!! ❤️‍🔥Many blessings…

March 5th!! This morning I’m writing at Oakridge Garden Center, enjoying a Caramel Macchiato.. Early afternoon I’ll be going to my moms place. I’ll bring her to get a blood test, maybe go grocery shopping, help her in her condo and then read from my two books, the Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work, and Ordering Your Private World. God is so good, so near, caring about my inner self, my heart.

Last night while in the bathroom, getting ready for bed I had a thought of losing hope that this pocket of time would end soon, and then I remembered that I had heard in my heart the night before, “watch your heart!” and I knew that I needed to not allow my heart to agree with that thought; it would mean that I wouldn’t keep running spiritually but slow down to a heavy walk, and I don’t want that. In Ana Werner’s session last Wednesday at the end they were praying and the topic that it’s time to run came up, spiritually and for some physically as well, so I’m deciding not to give up running spiritually and not give up hope that Jesus is coming back soon.

I’m also remembering my other dream that Lucas tried to hurry by starting to run on the road right in front of the bus, but I told him to comeback because the bus was coming so quickly that I didn’t want him to get hit by it. I’m not sure if these two are the same things. So I’m just going to keep going, trusting as I’m doing what I’m sensing God/Jesus saying.. I’m thinking todays writing represents the bed and toilet I saw in my dream two nights ago where those rooms were filled to the top with clear water; I believe the water represents the Holy Spirit. I’m sensing to write and video my true testimony later.. So then I’ll focus on reading.

March 6: I heard there’s going to be another storm today, so sad! Im quickly going to stop at Costco and then head home. I can feel my throat and my sinuses, getting a cold. The movie was good yesterday, though Bella and I needed to close our eyes at times. My hope is that God will open my eyes (spiritually) so that I can clearly see and be able to step deeper in His plans for my life! The theatre room we were in was #4, and when the movie was done I looked at the time and it was 1:06 (March 6th)! I know these are little things but they remind me that God is close to me and that He loves me. On the way home yesterday I noticed that the licence plate on a double bus ended with 331!! We passed it (it was about to merge into our lane), so it was behind us like in my dream! Blessings… ☕️🙏🏻