“For with You is the fountain of life; in Your light we see light.” – Psalm 36:9
Conversation
Papa, I love You. I praise Your Holy name. You are the King of my heart.
Caroline My daughter, come, it’s time. I love you.
Papa, I’m coming, and I’m ready to follow You. Thank-You for Your forgiveness.
Come My daughter, rest. Now is the time.
Yes Papa, I’m ready to follow You. Enable me when I’m not sure. Help me to clearly hear Your voice because I want to do what You want me to do. (Sensing hidden treasure within me that I will discover as I follow Jesus.)
That’s right My daughter, come and follow Me, and I will make you a fisher of men (people).
Yes Papa, Yes Jesus, I’m following You…
Reflection
Hello and welcome to my Journal. Life in the valley can be very difficult, but we need to remember that God is always faithful. Right now I’m in a valley, being tested and pruned so that in God’s time I’ll be ready to walk out of this valley, Victorious! What I’ve been doing so I don’t stay in a place of despair is spending time with God and crying out to Him because I know He hears me and He loves me. I’m keeping on doing what He’s already asked me to do. I’m clinging onto hope because God is my firm foundation. God is faithful and I know that He will never let me down, and I’m going to stay faithful to Him. He has shown me His faithfulness more times than I can count, and I know His love through that. God gives me dreams and wakes me up at certain times. As you read my journal my hope is that even though I’m in a valley in my life, I hope you will be inspired to always keep your heart open to God no matter what’s going on in your life, because God is a God of Love and He always has a Good plan for our life. He knows how to lead us; we just need to trust Him and follow Him!
June 11 6:29 “Oh she beautiful, she’s apart of me, she’s my wife…”
This morning I had just woken up, I was awake and I saw in a vision Jesus my husband casually walking towards me from the front. He had a sweater over his shoulder and he was holding it with one hand. The feeling I had was about following him. Yes, I’m following Jesus, and I’m submitting myself to him with all my heart… Thank-You Papa! These next three scripture verses, the Holy Spirit was working in my heart and I sobbed..
God is Faithful and True: Revelation 19:11 “I saw heaven standing open and there before me was a white horse, whose rider is called Faithful and True. With justice he judges and makes war.”
Giving us the Holy Spirit: Luke 11:13 “If you then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!” (here I recognized that my whole life before, I was separated from God because I wasn’t living in my God-given purpose -in this way yes, living separately like this is living in evil, and I repented, sobbing)
Full of Power: Romans 13:1 “Everyone must submit himself to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God.” Papa, Jesus, Holy Spirit, I submit myself to the people in authority over me, because it’s You who has established them. You are full of Power. I submit myself to You, to Jesus, and I’m so glad and thankful…
Sunrise this morning was 5:21, the exact time (5:21PM) that I finished reading my book yesterday! The feeling I had about my vision was about following Jesus. Yes, I’m following him, and I’m submitting myself to him with ALL my heart… This morning I listened to the whole playlist, beginning with Creation to Salvation. As this song was playing I really understood how living my life before submitting to God’s will for my life, was separating me from God, and it tore my heart to pieces; I never thought of it like that. I believe that my heart is finally wide open and together with Jesus,, and that I’ve finally accepted Jesus into my heart in a new and powerful way.
9:11 Today is the day that I died to myself, my will. I’m following Jesus, and my whole life is about to change because I’m submitting myself to Jesus today, right now… I’m ready; my flesh counts for nothing, and I’m not going to worry about how I’m going to get things done, about what I’m saying yes to. All things are possible through Christ Jesus who gives me strength.
9:24 I love you My darling. Come, rest, I am near.
Psalm 36:9 “For with You is the fountain of life; in Your light we see light.” (I opened my Bible this morning and this is the verse it opened up to.)
10:47 “You are forgiven.” (I heard clearly during communion this morning)
10:50/10:51 Thank You Papa..
I don’t have to be the strongest. I trust Jesus to lead me, and I am so honoured to walk with him, to follow him… Yesterday if I would have remembered, I would have chosen Habit 7. I had made notes in my notebook to talk about it, but I wasn’t thinking about it as being a habit; I was thinking about Covey’s overall definition of leadership, about investing in people which I totally resonate with, “leadership is communicating others’ worth and potential so clearly that they are inspired to see it in themselves.” (p412) Not knowing my worth and value has kept me from living a real life so I think my story could have a deep impact on those who struggle with it. The Habit of having a Balanced self-Renewal is also something that I recognize to be very important, and even though it makes life so much busier, I’ve been able to do all four; Perspective (spiritual -spending time with God), autonomy (mental -writing), connectedness (social -volunteering at church and getting together with friends), and Tone (physical -working out 3 times a week, also trying to run). I think my eyes of understanding are open now… Bella and I are going to the airport for 4:23. I’m in chapter 8 of, “the Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work, and I’m looking forward to continuing to read. It reminds me about yesterday when I said I wished that I had that, having a strong personality, knowing so much about everything and being assertive all the time like one of my friends. I recognized since then that having these thoughts is wishing who God made me to be, away, and I really don’t want to wish myself away because I really do like the person who God made me to be. I love it that I’m a good listener and I really value when other people have this gift.. This is my 616th Post!!! Love and Blessings…❤️🔥
I took a half hour nap at 2:30 and had these short dreams..
Fixing the corner (inside) of the floor of a railway car
Something about having chicken?
2:47 a group of people were stepping onto a high rise, like it was the top of a museum
2:50 There were two people in an office, and one of them was very emotional, standing up and expressing himself physically. I kind of heard, “getting ready”
2:54 Someone was coming home on a plane and his spouse was waiting for him and had taken her baby with her to wait for him.
3:00 I saw a light green lighter right in front of my face.
June 12: (I forgot to write the time, but I think it was after 1:00) Me and few more people were dealing with coyotes who were trying to bite us. Someone near me was holding one down and keeping its mouth closed. Then my head was close to the floor and one of them started trying to bite me but the person was able to keep it away. Then I had my hand on a coyote’s mouth, shutting it. Someone said something about us going to where the wolves are. I’m wondering if this means going on the North end missions? 😃
I saw an area like an open office with some people working. Then a lady who was dressed casually, wearing jeans, came out of a room, walked across the open area and walked into her office; the doorway was completely open. She was the boss of the people there but she looked like a mom. She was very joyful as she walked. As she walked into the room I saw a bit of a shadow on her lower area. I don’t know what the shadow or darker area could represent. Blessings…