“Taste and see that the Lord is good; blessed is the man who takes refuge in him.”
Psalm 34:8
Conversation
My Papa. I love You so much!! One great thing about going through trials is that when we remain steadfast in You, our love for You grows and deepens. Thank-You for stretching my heart so much.
Carolyn, I have something for you today.
Papa, My heart is wide open. What is it that You have for me?
“Come (Taste) and see that the Lord is good..” “His love endures forever.” (Psalm 34:8; song: Forever)
Come My darling, rest. I will supply all your needs.
Okay Papa, I’m putting all my trust in You again. I am Yours, more deeply than before.
I know. Come, I will show you the way. You are Mine.
Reflection
Hello and welcome to my Journal. Life in the valley can be very difficult, but we need to remember that God is always faithful. Right now I’m in a valley, being tested and pruned so that in God’s time I’ll be ready to walk out of this valley, Victorious! What I’ve been doing as I’m waiting is spending time with God and keeping on doing what He’s already asked me to do. I’m clinging onto hope because God is my firm foundation. God is faithful and I know that He will never let me down, and I’m going to stay faithful to Him. He has shown me His faithfulness all the time and I know His love through that. God gives me dreams and wakes me up at certain times. As you read my journal my hope is that even though I’m in a valley in my life, I hope you will be inspired to always keep your heart open to God no matter what’s going on in your life, because God is a God of Love and He always has a Good plan for our life. He knows how to lead us; we just need to trust Him and follow Him! Very often God draws my heart to Him through love songs! My love for God/Jesus keeps on growing as I continue to pursue Him. During the night God wakes me up at certain times with either a word from Him and/or a dream. So here’s my journal entry for today..
10:05 I saw a blue jean heart with some pink colours around the edges.
10:35 “There’s hope, in the morning hope, in the evening.. with power to save, with power to save.” (You Keep Hope Alive)
11:13 “There’s hope, in the morning hope, in the evening.. with power to save, with power to save.”
11:20 plan
1:29/ 1:30 You keep hope alive
4:50 Your love changes everything!
5:20 “I don’t deserve it, darling you look perfect tonight…”
5:30 Come
5:31 “Me and you!!” “It takes two baby, it takes two baby…me and you!!” (It Takes Two: Marvin Gaye & Kim Weston) I haven’t heard this song since I was probably in my twenty’s. In a dream recently I heard a part of a song that was recorded in the 60’s or 70’s. I’m reminded that God always has a plan…
5:44 Papa, I want Your purpose for my life…
5:47 I know My darling, then come. The door is open for you.
6:03 Papa, Jesus, I want You, and I want All You have for me!!!
6:12 “Darling just dive right in, and follow my lead…”
6:13/14 Papa, I have a sense that my heart is finally convinced… (I have a yes in my heart)
“We were just kids when we fell in love, not knowing what it was, I will not give you up, this time… darling just kiss me slow, your heart is all I own, and in your eyes you’re holding mine.
“Baby I’m, dancing in the dark, with you between my arms. Barefoot on the grass, listening to our favourite song. When you said you looked a mess, I whispered underneath my breath but you heard it, darling you look perfect tonight.”
6:33 I saw a bright yellow and blue
6:37 In a dream I saw we were in a city beside a busy street on a sidewalk, and I saw a round flat black thing that was stuck on a persons foot as he took some quick steps. I vaguely saw the front of a truck like a garbage truck and it was backing up.
6:47 “Chasing after you” I saw someone was given a big white paper and he sat at a picnic table and put the paper in front of him on the table, and he was looking at it. The feeling I had was that there was nothing on it. I’m sensing this has to do with my testimony. I started it awhile ago and I’ll need to start working on it again.
6:52 I dreamt that I was at a store and someone was on a high chair or something and they jumped off of it, landing on the floor. There was a person working at the store who smiled. I think she had a round black hat on. She reminds me of those clowns who pretend there’s a glass in front of them but there’s really not.
Yesterday I had dreamt that I saw someone with a black dog and I thought God gave me the dream to show me He was wanting me to get up, so I got up. Then I saw someone at the park that had a black dog. I was also hoping it didn’t represent that I wouldn’t make it.
7:04 Well I found a woman, stronger than anyone I know. She shares my dreams I hope that someday, I’ll share her home… (I found a lover, to carry more than just my secrets, to carry love, to carry children of our own…)
I vaguely remember I had a dream at night where I could upgrade my house.
7:14 I saw our green towel and saw a fray on the edge. In waking life this is what it looks like.
7:17 I vaguely saw a dark green sleeping bag
7:20 I saw a passenger seat behind the drivers seat that’s in the van. The seat is meant for three people and there was a line between the place right behind the drivers seat and the other two places on the seat. In waking life I desperately want to sit behind the pastor, thinking that this is what it means..
7:40 Papa
Rest, I am for you, not against you.
7:42 Thank You Papa, please forgive me. I love you so much Papa, Jesus…
7:45/46 I saw a circle in the air and vaguely saw someone like Dr. Strange behind the circle, like he was doing magic. Time?
7:50 I had a dream where the Maker Space room at the elementary school was full of supplies and the person in charge of the room waved both hands in front of her indicating no, and said no, there’s no more space (Someone had come to her and asked her about it). (No more “outer space?” Or I don’t need to work at the elementary school anymore?) I haven’t signed the contract yet.
7:52 “Darling just dive right in, and follow my lead.”
7:59 Papa…
Trust Me
8:04 I was following someone , walking beside a long white barn and we were right at the end of it, about to walk behind it. It reminds me of when I was really young; there was a white barn or two near where I grew up in town. In the back of the barn was a place where we found kittens. In my dream I was hoping Bella would know where I was. This reminds me of when we went to the Outlet mall on Monday; Lucas and I went to the back of the Underarmour store where he was trying on new clothes. Bella had gone to look at some shoes and I was hoping she would know to look at the change rooms to know where we were when she came back to the store.
8:09 In my dream it felt like I was at an indoor pool and I saw a dad putting his things in an open bag (like the plastic one we use at youth, underneath the counter, with paper and pencil crayons for kids to draw) feeling like his son was done swimming lessons.
8:19 I saw two girls giggle as they walked quickly, saying “I don’t want to.” It felt like they were walking beside an indoor pool and they didn’t want to do something they were afraid of doing.
8:23 “…we’re so in love, fighting against all odds, I will not give you up this time…”
8:29 “the last one” seeing I was at the edge of a slope going down at the skate park. If we would go again I would intentionally fall…
8:31 “I have faith in what I see…”
8:36 I saw sandals, two pairs of feet wearing sandals, like friends going for a walk outside. One of them were woman’s feet and the other one could have been too, wearing dressy sandals and had bell bottom, full length pants on. I will wear this today, and if I don’t dream about clothing again before Sunday, I’ll wear it again with my white blouse.
8:49 I saw Jesus with brown shorts on; I was inside a building by an open door, and I saw him nearby, outside, standing with both of his arms up in the air. I saw the side of him.
8:50 “I don’t deserve this, darling you look perfect tonight.”
8:54 “we’ll wait” I saw Jesus from the side and he was telling someone this, holding out and kind of waving his left hand to me. The room we were in was a bit dark. I’m hoping we don’t need to wait…
9:02 My daughter, rise up.
9:10 I was with someone who had a rag in their hands, and they were going to clean the toilets that were nearby. Wondering if I’m done “going to the bathroom?” This reminds me of the toilets I saw in the video about diapers.
9:11 All is well with thee my daughter, rest.
9:13 Someone said to me by an open door, indicating with their arm, “enter, injured.”
9:22 Listening to the song, “King Of Kings” hearing the lyrics, “You did not despise the cross” reminds me that Jesus knew it would be painful, yet He went ahead and died for us. Yesterday I knew it would be painful and I couldn’t do it. This is so selfish. I think by not doing it, it’s much more painful…
9:47 “You can do this” (I heard this in my heart)
Papa, please forgive me! Dying to myself is so painful, but I can feel a difference and I hope this is a step forward. I’m feeling that I want to go where You are leading me. I have a “yes” in my heart for you Papa, Jesus… I love You Papa, Jesus and I thankyou for your patience with me, saying this by faith, hoping there’s still patience left, for me…
10:03 “You are good, good, ohh You are good, good, ohh. You’re never gonna let, never gonna let me down. You’re never gonna let, never gonna let me down.”
10:20 While praying I saw someone coming into an area of construction (intersection I think) with small orange flags all over the area. I saw a right turn, sensing that the person was going to plow through it, but it was blocked off by orange flags and the road wasn’t made to go on yet. I’m thinking that the right turn represents my right hand. My left hand represents marriage and family. This dream is comforting, hoping it’s showing that it’s not over and I still have another opportunity…
1:16 “I found a love, for me. Darling just dive right in, follow my lead…” (When I heard this in my heart it was so clear.) I’m clinging onto God. Love and Blessings…❤️🔥❤️🔥